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- Three years after a prank went terribly awry, the six college students responsible are targeted by a masked killer at a New Year's Eve party aboard a moving train.
- In 1825, an English aristocrat is captured by Native Americans. He lives with them and begins to understand their way of life. Eventually, he is accepted as part of the tribe and aspires to become their leader.
- A satanist cult leader is burnt alive by the local church. He vows to come back to hunt down and enslave every descendant of his congregation, by the power of the book of blood contracts, in which they sold their souls to the devil.
- A single mother prostitute, who goes by the name Princess, finds herself forced to work undercover for the police in order to apprehend a homicidal, misogynistic pimp named Ramrod, who will do anything not to get arrested.
- A scientist (Rock Hudson) doing experiments on a human fetus discovers a method to accelerate the fetus into a mature adult in just a few days. All is not well though as the child begins to exhibit some horrific tendencies.
- A mother goes to Hollywood to find her runaway daughter. The Vice Squad discovers that a dangerous gangster has turned the girl into one of his junkie teen prostitutes. The Squad also investigates illegal betting and a BDSM pornographer.
- A partially under construction office tower is being haunted by a deadly presence which seems to target the building's architect.
- When an underwater ocean lab is lost in a earthquake, an advanced submarine is sent down to find it and encounters terrible danger.
- When an industrialist's wife and kids are kidnapped by terrorists in Greece, the woman's ex-husband comes to the rescue with a plan involving hang gliders.
- The English gentleman known as Horse, returns to the American west to save his adopted Indian tribe from extinction.
- Two rival high school football coaches play fast and loose, backed by sexy cheerleaders, when their teams face of for the city championship title.
- A disgraced former police officer returns to Los Angeles as a private detective and vigilante to catch a mass murderer. When he crosses paths with his estranged wife, he tries to rekindle their relationship.
- When the widow of an accidentally murdered mob bookkeeper goes looking for revenge she mistakenly finds it in this slapstick comedy of errors. Forced to go on the lam with her young daughter, she hooks up with an unlucky cabbie for the ride of their lives through New York City.
- Mack and Myer are hired to install a tile floor at an explorer's club. Myer covers himself with the bearskin rug and scares Mack. The boys have to move two couches, and wind up tripping a waiter. Mack nearly impales the waiter when he takes away a spear from Myer, and the gun Myer was playing with blows up in Mack's face. Finally getting around to the tiles, they cause more havoc for themselves and the waiter, who always seems to be carrying something breakable. The boys wind up short one tile, so Myer gets another one - from the other side of the floor. Hoping to cover the missing tile with the couches, they send the waiter flying one last time. But the waiter gets his revenge.
- The two bungling handymen must deliver a surprise gift to a housewife from her husband. When the huge appliance must be installed upstairs, fun and pratfalls ensue.
- Mr. Burns, a tailor, hires Mack and Myer as his assistants. He leaves them in charge and tells them to clean up the shop and make sure they turn off the dry cleaning machine. Myer fools around with an iron and a sewing machine, and Mack suffers the consequences. A customer comes in to get a suit altered. Myer thinks he recognizes him from a magazine: It's Baby-Face Fogarty. But it's actually Detective Harrison, who arrested Fogarty and got his picture in the magazine. The boys call the police station for help, then do everything to stall their customer until the cops arrive. Mr. Burns returns, identifies his bound and gagged customer as the detective, and the boys get a free ride in the dry cleaning machine.
- Pretty Boy Percy, "the world's greatest jewel robber," gets a face-lift to look like Mack, one of the janitors at Norman's Jewelry Store. He knocks out Mack, then joins Myer on the clean-up crew. But Mack regains consciousness, and Pretty Boy has to keep conking him on the head while stuffing jewelry into a bag. Myer notices "Mack" speaks in a deeper-than-usual voice, and offers him an aspirin and a glass of water, assuming "Mack" is sick. "Mack" rejects the offer, but the real Mack has a headache and asks for an aspirin. This routine goes back-and-forth a few times until "Mack" pulls a pistol on Myer, who throws water in his face and escapes. The police barge in and make an arrest...but did they get the right guy?
- Nervous Mr. Marshall can't get his landlord to repair anything in his apartment, so he hires Mack and Myer. The "walk this way" gag is repeated several times as he shows the boys what needs to be fixed. First, they have to turn off the radiator (Mack gets squirted), then replace a light in the refrigerator (Myer installs a giant bulb). While Mack works on the sink and stove, Myer oils a squeaky door hinge and sands the floor. Mr. Marshall plans to charge his landlord for the repair work, so when the boys ask for a measly $7, he starts a reverse-bidding war and gets them up to $650. "Walk this way" again while Mr. Marshall inspects their work, which culminates in the drastically over-sanded floor collapsing, dropping all three onto the bed of the downstairs neighbor.
- Mack and Myer are working for a barber. The first customer gives them a dollar bill for a tip. Myer tears it in half, because they are splitting the tips. The second customer is bald, but he likes to hear the sound of scissors over his head, because it reminds him of when he had hair. The barber tells Myer to give the customer a shoe shine, but he's wearing sandals. After the non-haircut and a facial, the barber dabs an astringent on the customers face...and it grows hair. The barber rubs it into the man's scalp, and it works again. It's a million-dollar discovery. The only problem is that Myer mixed something in the astringent bottle - and can't remember what. While Mack mixes a new batch, the barber shaves Myer's head to test it. Will it work?
- The boys think they were hired to build a new subway tunnel - starting in the basement of their building - but they are unknowingly tunneling into prison so that Scarface can break out. Mack crashes through the cellar floor and discovers that the tunnel is already partly built. Among other mishaps, Myer sits on the dynamite plunger before Mack is out of harm's way. Their shady boss, Mr. Victor, insists on breaking through the final wall...and he gets a big surprise.
- The boys are hired to wash windows, but stumble into the laboratory of a scientist who is looking for humans with the intelligence of a chimpanzee. He locks them in a space chamber and puts them through a gravity test, a "speed" test (with slow-motion running effects), and a reverse-motion test. When he runs all three tests simultaneously, it somehow switches the boys' voices and personalities.
- Fancying himself "The American Nightingale," Myer hopes to win $100 at an amateur contest by singing "Wait Till the Sun Shines, Nellie." He knocks down the backdrop while practicing, so Mack helps the stage manager fix the curtain. Myer mistakes the stage manager's directions of "a little higher...no, higher...now lower...lower" for musical direction, similar to Lou Costello in "Naughty Nineties." Myer has an attack of nerves during the show and brings the backdrop down again, but the audience loves it.
- The boys are hired to clean Madame Gretshnikov's musical instrument shop, but have to do so quietly, while she rehearses for an audition at the opera. Mack gets a crack on the head for putting a crack in a "very valuable" record. Myer swallows a pitch pipe, so Mack "plays" him by pressing different parts of his chest, and a customer gets showered with sheet music. After Madame leaves for her audition, Mack plays piano and Myer sneezes in accompaniment to the tune of "While Strolling Through the Park One Day." Madame returns and tells the boys to "wreck the store" because she got the part, but the opera calls back to tell her they reconsidered because her voice is too loud. Unfortunately, Mack and Myer have already started demolition.
- The boys sit down to eat lunch behind a department store. Myer tosses a banana peel on the ground, and while Mack picks it up, a robber comes out of the back door and trips over him. As a reward for foiling the robbery, they are given jobs in the package-wrapping department. They forget to wrap the bottom of one package (crash!), and have problems fitting a large box into the dumbwaiter. Eventually the manager winds up in the dumbwaiter and they're fired. Back outside to finish their other banana, a second crook slips on the peel. The boys wisely take it on the lam.
- The boys have to clear out "this entire wing of the museum" (as usual, a rinky-dink one-room set) for the exhibition of the never-before-seen statue "The Plunge of Hercules." While Myer removes debris, Mack keeps running head-first into a large board that two other workers inexplicably keep moving from one side of the room to the other (to the accompaniment of a jaunty Bavarian-style tune). Myer wonders why Mack is "always lying on the floor." Myer uses glass cleaner on a painting. Mack gets a face full of dissolving paint. While moving a board, Myer pokes a hole in the wall, which he covers with Gainsborough's "Blue Boy." Mack is suspicious and uncovers the hole. He unwisely asks Myer how it happened. Myer's demonstration puts a hole in "Blue Boy." They try to repair the wall using plaster of Paris left by the other workmen, but destroy art object #3, the as-yet-unseen statue. Myer suggests they make a new statue, since no one in the USA has seen this one. But it's Mack who takes a plunge into the plaster and goes on exhibit as "The Plunge of Hercules."
- This atypical entry in the series, with virtually no slapstick, is modeled on Dicken's "A Christmas Carol." Mack complains that Myer is wasting food, water, electricity, money, etc. That night, Mack dreams he is MacScrooge, picking on his poor employee Myer. The ghost of his former business partner, Starkley, visits and sends only two spirits - the Present and the Future (both played by Mack) - to show him the error of his ways. After Myer helps him in the Future dream, Mack wakes up a changed man.
- Mack tells Myer the story of Cinderella (played by Mack). Her step-sister (Myer, wearing a long fake nose) and step-mother (Mack) go to the ball. Her fairy godmother (Mack) has a few problems with her wand. The prince (Myer) falls madly in love. No surprise at the ending. It's basically an excuse for the boys to do a little drag comedy.
- Mack and Myer are hired to deliver expensive fragile antiques - using their motorcycle and sidecar. But it's Friday the 13th, which worries Myer, especially when he's confronted with an open umbrella in the house, a teetering mirror on the wall, walking under a ladder, and a black cat that crosses his path.