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- Young Dorothy Gale and her dog Toto are swept away by a tornado from their Kansas farm to the magical Land of Oz, and embark on a quest with three new friends to see the Wizard, who can return her to her home and fulfill the others' wishes.
- A widowed sportscaster raises his three daughters with assistance from his rock and roll brother-in-law and madcap best friend.
- In this pilot for a proposed TV series, a group of "friends" live in a sometimes peaceful co-existence. Tom is a handsome deliveryman living with his gorgeous girlfriend Shannon, his stepsister Maria, and their lazy friend Jackson. Tom is on the rocks with Shannon again over their flirtations with other people. When Tom meets Kelly Bundy while delivering a package to the Bundy house, he asks her out for the evening. To make Tom jealous, Shannon asks out a handsome millionaire named Henry and the four of them end up at the local greasy-spoon diner in the inner city, which is run by friendly cook George. The evening gets more X-rated when Tom and Shannon try to outdo each other with their dates.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.5 (484)TV EpisodeOn their 25th wedding anniversary, Peggy goes out with Marcy to a posh health spa where Peggy gets conned out of all her money by a gift shop employee selling cheap beauty items. Meanwhile, Al is in trouble when the old and senile Buck buries in the back yard the anniversary gift necklace he plans to give Peggy, which prompts him, Bud, and Kelly to literally dig up the entire back yard looking for the necklace.
- When Kelly becomes successful on a kid's television show, she becomes a total bitch and control freak. Her manager, Bud, decides Princess Kelly should be taught a lesson she will not forget. Meanwhile, Al tries to avoid sharing a bed with Peg by sawing off half of their bed as she is tempted to have sex with him in bed.
- It's Thanksgiving. In Al's childhood, it was a tradition to eat aunt Maddie's potato pie on Thanksgiving, so Al takes a trip with Griff to see aunt Maddie in order to buy some pie. Unfortunately it turns out that she's just died. Jefferson can't find a turkey for Marcy because they've sold out. Then a stray turkey just happens to follow Kelly home. Will Kelly let the others eat it?
- When Major League Baseball goes on a strike, NO MA'AM organizes their own league sponsored by nude bars.
- 1987–199723mTV-PG7.7 (506)TV EpisodeAl and Griff convinces Gary to use the extra space for an aerobic's studio in the hopes that it'll attract pretty women. When it attracts fat women instead, Kelly convinces her father's boss to hire Ramon. It turns the tide against Feminist Marcy.
- Al decides to build a dog house for Lucky. But when he makes an absurd amount of noise in the back yard, Marcy bribes a building inspector to inspect Al's work just to harass him. When the inspector tells him that the house is not up to its "code," Al, with Kelly's wealthy boyfriend Carlos, tear it down and rebuild it again and again to get it right. Meanwhile, Kelly desperately tries to get Carlos's attention. She spends a lot of Al's money (which he swindles from Carlos) to go to the salon to achieve the natural look of the women of his village. Thus, she is spending a lot of money to look like she has spent no money on her looks. Bud says, "you are your mother's daughter." Kelly says, "Well, duh..." Carlos has spent a lot of money to come to America to get away from women of his village. Al ends up with a lot of Carlos's money.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.7 (494)TV EpisodePeggy gets invited to the Bingo Invitational Final. To their horror, Al and Jefferson hear that the new spokes-model for their official No Ma'am club beer, Girlie Girl Beer, is Yoko Ono. Therefore, No Ma'am must select a new official beer.
- Al and Bud go on a bear hunt in the woods to prove they're as manly as Peggy's father, Ephraim, so he can take back Peggy's unseen mother. Al and Bud bring back what they think is a dead bear they found in the woods, but they are in for a big surprise when the bear wakes up from hibernation and wreaks havoc on them and the city.
- Al makes Peg stop her constant shopping by taking his card away from her and electrifying the phone so that she cannot place any orders. Meanwhile, it's Jefferson's 40th birthday and he has to accept he is no longer a young man and Marcy may one day leave him; so, Marcy forces him to get a job, which he does, as the new aerobics instructor at a new health club Peggy wins a free membership pass for. Elsewhere, Gary hires Bud and Kelly to shoot a TV commercial for the shoe store. There is a role for a shoe salesman. Al forces Bud to hire him, but Al has no acting experience.
- Marcy organizes a "Toys for guns" campaign to get kids something else to play with than toy guns. Kelly has a post-graduation five-year reunion and is shocked to learn that the nerd she once stood up has become handsome and rich.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.7 (486)TV EpisodeAl agrees to let Peg invite the Darcy's and Griff (plus one) to an evening party in exchange for a month of no sex. As a party game, the pairs test their knowledge of the other half. Unfortunately, Al has forgotten the most romantic night between him and Peg, who throws him out to the doghouse, literally. Meanwhile, Kelly is auditioning for a role, but faces stiff competition from her nemesis Heather Talrico, another blonde bimbo. Kelly challenges Heather to a boxing match; the loser has to give up the role.
- 1987–199721mTV-PG7.5 (464)TV EpisodeAl makes true of his threat to move out. But what about custody of the two TVs? The kids Al leaves to Peg. In foresight, he has hidden a nest egg in a secret compartment in the toilet seat. Peg becomes depressed, but the kids decide to find themselves a new step-dad. Marcy is ecstatic about Al's departure and has another plan to cheer Peg up. Meanwhile, Al is trying out the bachelor lifestyle, complete with a new look.
- 1987–199721mTV-PG7.5 (466)TV EpisodeAl is having difficulty adjusting to being single. Marcy is more than happy to share with him that Peg is having a dinner party with a millionaire. Al doesn't believe it, so Marcy tells him that what Peg really wants is for Al to come to the dinner party.
- Bud has invited not-too-bright student Ariel to play the "Strip Study" game, to prepare for upcoming exams he has to pass in order to graduate. Despite years of not ending up getting some, Bud gets lucky but falls asleep and realizes that in order to be able to concentrate on studying, he has to give up everything that reminds him of sex. This proves to be quite difficult. In order to find a place where nothing turns him on, Bud goes to the library. Surely he can forget about sex there?
- When Al finds out that Bud and Gary are dating, he and Griff decide to take advantage of the situation like a break room.
- Al and No MA'AM decides to hold a counter protest in the favor of banning breast feeding from the shoe store.
- When Al banishes a nursing mother for breast feeding her baby in the shoe store, Marcy and FANG holds a protest against Gary's Shoe Store in order to have him lift the ban.
- Al wants to beat rival shoe-shop owner Babcock in something and puts his faith in Bud, who's in the same entrepreneurial-studies class at Trumaine as Babcock's son Little Floyd. Each boy must come up with a product and a marketing campaign for it Al sees that he'll get his revenge if Bud's project gets a better grade than Little Floyd's. When Kelly brings home a sexy-guys calendar, Bud decides to make a Girls of Trumaine calendar. All goes well, especially with stunning cover girl Crystal Clark--until, sounding very troubled, she has second thoughts about appearing in the calendar. Meanwhile, Peg is on the road searching for her dad to save her parents' marriage.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.8 (581)TV EpisodeGary is restocking the shoe store and donating all the old shoes to Filipino orphans. When the lunch delivery girl accepts old sandals as payment because Al and Griff have no money, they realize that the shoes have trading value. Meanwhile, Kelly finally gets her masseuse license, but accidentally cripples Bud when trying out her skills on him.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.5 (486)TV EpisodeGary declares a sales contest between Al and Griff - the winner gets a raise. However, an appearance of an immigrant child who works in Gary's illegal sweatshop gives Al a better idea than selling shoes.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.8 (503)TV EpisodeWhen Al goes too far with the fat insults, he's put on trial by all the obese women he has insulted over the years.
- Al sells his soul to the Devil so he can play for the Bears. However, the Devil takes him to Hell the day of the Super Bowl with a fate worse than death planned: an eternity with the family and the D'Arcys.
- Bud's community service assignment for college is the one he is least suited for: consulting virgins on the brink of temptation, while he has to wrestle with temptation himself when he has to go to one's house to talk her out of it. Meanwhile, Al and Peggy go to the video store to find a movie they both can watch together.
- Al has to renew his driver's license and is upset to learn that Bud will be his Examiner.
- After the funeral of a former football teammate at the Bullpen Sports Bar, an old rival, named Jack Franklin, challenges Al and his former team from Polk High into a grudge football match between them. But Al ends up being turned into a tackling dummy by ringers Bubba Smith, Laurence Taylor, Ken Stabler and John Reynolds on the opposing team.
- Marcy's bank, Kyoto National, plans to donate a new scoreboard to Polk High and name it after Polk High's famous football alumni. Al, having scored four touchdowns in a single game, assumes it's him, but Marcy hates Al and is determined to find another football star just to spite him. When she learns that NFL all-star Terry Bradshaw attended Polk High for two months, she think she has found her man. While Kelly tries to talk to Bradshaw about letting Al have the title, Al, Jefferson, and Bud conspire to destroy the scoreboard.
- 1987–199723mTV-PG7.8 (516)TV EpisodeBud takes on wrestler King Kong Bundy as his initiation into "No Ma'am.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG8.2 (554)TV EpisodeAl's Dodge mysteriously disappears during a family visit to a local car wash while on their way to Wanker county. Meanwhile, Marcy's ex-husband, Steve Rhoades, mysteriously reappears at the car wash to show her his new life while she is trying to get the lazy Jefferson to work there.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.7 (492)TV EpisodeIt's Christmas. Al doesn't want a Christmas tree, the rest of the family do. Marcy is determined to win the neighborhood decorating contest. Gary hires two young guys, Hal and Biff, to help Al and Griff at the shoe store. Someone (actually Bud and Kelly) kidnaps Mary and Joseph from Marcy's Nativity Scene and demand $500 in ransom. Hal and Biff turn out to be such good workers that Gary decides to replace Al and Griff with them, permanently.
- Since Bud is actually earning money, Al starts charging rent for the basement. Bud and Al sign a lease and Bud pays his rent, after which he claims that the "apartment" is in need of repair. A health inspector declares the basement condemned and gives him a month to get the basement repaired. Al then is forced to wear an electronic neck band that prevents him from leaving the basement.
- 1987–199723mTV-PG7.6 (494)TV EpisodeMama Wanker moves in with the Bundys after fighting with her husband.
- 1987–199723mTV-PG7.8 (519)TV EpisodeKelly has unknowingly created a new color chemical called Bleen and Al quickly finds out that she has created a new formula that grows hair.
- Lonnie is freed from prison because it was overcrowded. He asks Al's blessing for marrying Kelly. He even has a ring. Turns out that Lonnie is one of the Tots who owns Tot Industries, makers of Weenie Tots. Suddenly, Lonnie is most welcome to the Bundy family.
- 1987–199723mTV-PG8.2 (531)TV EpisodeDuring the Christmas season, Griff becomes quite fond of a phone sex partner named "Butter," whom Al discovers is really Peg's mother.
- 1987–199730mTV-147.9 (532)TV EpisodeAl and his friends from NO MA'AM who include Griff, Officer Dan, Ike, and Bob Rooney travel to Washington D.C. where thanks to Jefferson's pull, being a former CIA agent, Al and the group gets to address the U.S. Senate about Psycho Dad being put back on the air.
- 1987–199722mTV-PG7.9 (526)TV EpisodeAl launches his group NO MA'AM in a protest outside the local TV station after Marcy's group FANG gets NO MA'AM's favorite TV show "Psycho Dad" canceled. But in a blizzard, no one takes notice. Meanwhile, Kelly and Bud try to convince Al to have them throw a house party for their friends.
- Kelly has a big zit on the day before her commercial for Ice Hole beer and Peg offers her a solution. Her uncle Sticky Wanker's zit removing potion will cure it. Al is ecstatic for her being in the commercial, despite being upset over not having tapes of Emma Peel. The Home Shopping Network has offered him a compromise, endless first edition volumes of The Three Stooges, which he also loves. His real problem is with Marcy and her feminist group. They recently filed suit against Ice Hole beer for not hiring average and unattractive women. It had gone nowhere as the jury ruled for the company and FANG is forced to protest against the commercial.
- Al gets an owl costume to scare away the birds who keep him awake. To impress Amber, Bud helps Kelly to learn archery for her audition.
- In order to get a $20,000 contract of a model for a national olive oil brand, Kelly has to sign a Morals Clause, which requires that she remain chaste. This proves to be a difficult task. Meanwhile, Al hears that Officer Dan is appearing in Al's favorite TV show, Cops, and blackmails him to become his partner.
- 1987–199723mTV-148.1 (503)TV EpisodeMarcy will not let Jefferson back in the house until he finds a job, so he hangs around at the Bundys. Bud gets Kelly a part in a Romantic Roast coffee commercial and when Kelly's co-star fails to perform up to expectations, Bud gets Jefferson the part. Jefferson's character Lance wins him legions of female fans which upsets Marcy but also ensures that two more commercials will be made with Kelly and Jefferson. But how will Al react when the script demands that Kelly and Jefferson kiss?
- Marcy wants the Bundys to stay indoors because her "identical" cousin Mandy is coming for a visit and Marcy does not want her to be repulsed by them. Mandy's flight, however, is early and she takes a cab. Since the D'Arcys are at the airport waiting for her, she comes to the Bundys. This leads to Mandy spending the day out with Al and Jefferson. Suddenly Peg and Marcy find themselves jealous.
- Peggy, jealous that Al is spending all his time at The Jiggly Room, decides to try out on amateur night while Al and the No Ma'am boys judge it. She wins the competition dressed as a harem girl named Jasmin, wearing a veil over her face. Al is turned on like never before, and he and Peggy have their best sex ever.
- To go out with hot guy named Carlos, Kelly bribes the reluctant Bud to keep company for Carlos's cousin Esmeralda by offering Bud a date with Fawn. Fortunately for Bud, Esmeralda turns out to be quite hot. Meanwhile, Al and Peg take Ephraim and Peggy's unseen mother to a marriage retreat.
- Bud's intense studying for a scholarship exam makes him periodically nod off and fantasize about making out with beautiful women. So, is a passionate encounter between him and Marcy's visiting, sexually aggressive, 19-year-old niece, Amber, a dream or real?
- When Kelly auditions for a part in a Fox network sitcom she happens to mention some stories about her family which the producer likes better then the original script.
- When Kelly and Al collaborate and make a short documentary film about shoes for Kelly's acting class in the Larry Storch School of Acting, they win a grant of $10,000 from the National Endowment of the Arts to make another movie: "A Day in the Life of a Shoe Salesman."
- In this pilot for a proposed new TV series, set on Trumaine University's radio station, W.H.I.P., DJ's Oliver Cole and Mark Campbell host several hours of unconventional and overlooked programming. After a probing interview, divulging the past of Trumaine's new dean of students, Steve Rhoades, both Oliver and Mark are kicked off the air and expelled from the college. Marcy arrives and upon hearing the news, she tries to get revenge against her ex-husband by leading a feeble on-air protest against their expulsion. But their protest doesn't attract much attention. Meanwhile, Bud is dating April Adams, a fellow student and intern from Marcy's bank, who is also being pursued by Nickolai Pushkin, a rugged, handsome basketball star from Russia. When Bud desperately attempts to steal April's affections away from Nickolai, Mark happens by and secretly broadcasts the conversation over the station and calls it "Hot Talk With April." Mark, Oliver, and their new show become so popular that dozens of people turn out for the protest, in which Steve backs down and lets them stay on the air and at the college. April ends up rejecting both Bud and Nickolai, as well as a job at Marcy's bank to remain with Mark and Oliver at their radio station.