College Coach (1933)

Charles C. Wilson: Charles Hauser

Quotes 

• Coach Gore : You read about Napoleon?

  Charles Hauser : Hey, you know I don't read much.

  Coach Gore : You know, that guy'd a made a great little football coach.

  Charles Hauser : Yeah, I bet he would, at that.

  Coach Gore : Sure, and I wouldn't make a bad general.

  Charles Hauser : There, there ain't much dough in that, though, is there?

  Coach Gore : Say, the next time there's a war, I'm gonna show 'em how a battle should be staged. It's just like football, Napoleon knew that.

  Charles Hauser : Yeah, but he lost out in his big game, didn't he.

  Coach Gore : No, he got crossed up in his signals.

• Coach Gore : Oh say, did you make deals with Weaver, Holcomb and Matthews?

  Charles Hauser : Yeah, I got 'em cheap too, considering how scarce good backfield material is. I had 'em at summer school all summer so they'd be legible.

  Coach Gore : Oh, that's fine. Oh, why you're at it, pick me up a couple of good tackles that can understand English, will ya.

• J- Marvin Barnett : That's your induction badge for the Campfire Boys of America. They are making you an honorary Grand Woodcraft Chief. I fixed it up for you.

  Coach Gore : I see. What are you getting out of it this time?

  J- Marvin Barnett : Oh, they're just making me an honorary Woodpecker. He's a Pecker too.

  Coach Gore : Yeah, well listen Woodpeckers you can take your Campfire Boys and...

  Charles Hauser : Now, wait a minute coach, you better do it, it's swell publicity. Remember, over a million kids belong to the Campfire Boys. They all got families and they all go to football games.

  J- Marvin Barnett : Pop Warner didn't get it.

  Coach Gore : He didn't?

  J- Marvin Barnett : No. Every Campfire Boy in America will have to call you Chief. You know, some of the biggest men in the world got it. As, eh, Will Rogers, Edward G. Robinson, W. C. Fields, Mickey Mouse.

  Coach Gore : Where did they ever coach?