Dizzy Doctors (1937)

Moe Howard: Moe

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dr. Bright : Have you ever sold anything?

  Larry : Have we ever SOLD anything!

  Moe : Have we ever SOLD anything!

  Curly : Have we?

• Curly : Hey, what's this stuff for anyway?

  Larry : Why it's a cleaner, you chump.

  Curly : I know. It's auto polish.

  Moe : You boys really want to know what it's for?

  Curly , Larry : Yeah!

  Moe : It's for sale. Now get busy selling it.

• Moe : [while "polishing" a man's shoe with Brighto]  Remember sir, Brighto! You'll never forget it as long as you live!

  [removes the rag to realize that the Brighto has eaten right through the man's shoe] 

  Moe : And neither will I!

• Moe : [in a hospital, in a room with a microphone connected to the loudspeaker, hits the three skulls to make a musical jingle then hits Curly on the head]  Hello, everybody, we just brought the moon over the mountain.

  Curly : Hello, Ma. Hello, Pa. It wasn't much of a fight. I stood like that. But not for long.

  [Moe hits him on the head] 

  Moe : Quiet. This broadcast comes to you through the courtesy of Brighto and its six delicious flavors. Chocolate, vanilla, cranberry, strawberry...

  Curly : And raspberry.

  [Moe slaps him] 

  Curly : Ouch! It's still raspberry.

  [sticks his tongue out, Moe hits him on the head] 

  Curly : Ow!

  Moe : Now keep quiet or I'll sock you again.

  Larry : Are you listening. V-v-v-voo. V-v-v-voo. V-v-v...

  [Moe hits him with a backhand punch in the face] 

  Moe : Now, don't go away, gentlemen. We'll soon be with you.

  Moe , Curly , Larry : Zheee. Boom! Cuckoo!

• Moe : Brighto, Brighto, makes old bodies new!

  Larry : We'll sell a million bottles!

  Curly : Woo woo woo woo woo woo woo!

• Dr. Bright : Well boys, how did it go?

  Curly : We rubbed it on a man's car, and it took the paint right off. That polish ain't no good.

  Dr. Bright : Polish? You idiots, that's medicine!

  Curly : Medicine?

  [Curly drinks a bottle] 

  Curly : I feel better already!

  Moe : What was wrong with you?

  Curly : Nothing.

  [Moe slaps Curly] 

• Moe : [escaping from Dr. Arms on a gurney after realizing they ruined his car's paint job]  Give it gas, boys. Give it gas.

  Larry : They're gainin' on us. More speed, more speed.

  Curly : I got it wide open.

  Moe : Well, open it wider.

  Curly : I can't. I can't find the clutch.

  [sound of him getting slapped] 

  Curly : Ohh!

• Moe : [on a gurney and colliding with a hospital patient in a wheelchair]  What's the idea of going through a boulevard stop?

  Larry : Look at our fender.

  Curly : Soitenly. Where's your operator's license?

  Moe : Why don't you say something?

  Curly : [before he can speak]  That's enough.

  Moe : Just as I thought, drunk driving. Give him a ticket.

  Larry : One-way or round-trip?

  Moe : Make it a one-way round-trip...

  [conking him on the forehead] 

  Moe : What do you want?

• Moe : What's that you got?

  Curly : Cheese.

  Moe : [taking it and sniffing it]  Cheese? That's soap.

  Curly : I thought it tastes kinda strong.

• Moe : Get up, you sleepyheads. Look at me, every morning, wide awake, 11:00.

  Larry : I'm awake.

  Moe : How 'bout you?

  Curly : I'm awake, but I can't get my eyes open.

  [getting eye-poked] 

  Curly : Oow! Thanks.

• Sleeping Patient : [awoken after sleeping for 87 days]  Why, you idiots, I've been trying to beat Rip Van Winkle's record. I wanna go to sleep. Put me to sleep!

  Moe : Boys, put.

  [Curly and Larry bonk him on the head with mallets, and Curly puts a "Quiet, do not disturb" sign on his chest] 

  Curly : Nighty-night.

• Curly : A guy wants to know what to do for inflammation.

  Moe : Why call us? Tell him to dial Inflammation!