The Solid Gold Cadillac (1956)
Paul Douglas: Edward L. McKeever
Photos
Quotes
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Edward L. McKeever : I was hoping to talk to you again, because the last time I saw you, I - well, it was - it was an abrupt departure.
Laura Partridge : Oh, it was abrupt. You ran like a thief.
Edward L. McKeever : Miss Partridge, you see, I'm a businessman, and all my life I've concentrated on business. Now, this has necessarily forced me to devote more of my time to some things and less to others. You understand.
Laura Partridge : Sure. You're scared of girls.
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Laura Partridge : Do you like Shakespeare?
Edward L. McKeever : Well, I've read a lot of it.
Laura Partridge : Well, take my advice and don't play it! It's so tiring! They don't let you sit down unless you're a king!
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Edward L. McKeever : Aren't there a lot of little theaters off-Broadway, you know, groups?
Laura Partridge : Oh, sure. I used to belong to one last year: The Young Shakespeareans. You know what they did? Nothing but Shakespeare.
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Laura Partridge : I demonstrated a stove on television. "Try this Transcontinental gas range with the ever-loving oven."
Edward L. McKeever : Oh, you're an actress.
Laura Partridge : Well, if you want to call it acting. No, but I am an actress. Oh, but not just television. The stage is my field.
Edward L. McKeever : Oh, really? Are you in anything now?
Laura Partridge : Well, at the moment I'm in menswear at Bloomingdale's. Just part-time. Show business is a little slow, anyway for me. You know, I'm a very unusual type.
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Laura Partridge : It's you!
Edward L. McKeever : Yes, it's me; but, you.
Laura Partridge : Oh, it's me too!
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Laura Partridge : Would you like some coffee?
Edward L. McKeever : Well, I'm due in Blessington's office.
Laura Partridge : How about a sandwich?
Edward L. McKeever : No, not really.
Laura Partridge : Oh, it's delicious! It's peanut butter and smoked salmon. I make it myself.
Edward L. McKeever : Well, no, just some coffee.
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Edward L. McKeever : [reciting "Spartacus to the Gladiators" by Elijah Kellogg] "... There are no noblemen, but Romans."
[bows]
Edward L. McKeever : Well, what did you think?
Laura Partridge : Well?
Edward L. McKeever : No good, huh?
Laura Partridge : Oh, I wouldn't say that.
Edward L. McKeever : You mean, you like it?
Laura Partridge : Oh, I wouldn't say that, either.
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Edward L. McKeever : That's a nasty thing. A young girl comes to Washington to try and get an innocent, honest businessman to do something unethical. To entice him with her wiles.
Laura Partridge : My wiles? I didn't plan to use one single, solitary wile on you.
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Edward L. McKeever : The company! They outfitted you in silks and perfumes to break down my morale. They sent Delilah to call on Samson. You're here to give me a haircut!
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Edward L. McKeever : I just can't give you any business.
Laura Partridge : I don't want any business!
Edward L. McKeever : You don't want any?
Laura Partridge : Oh, I do! But the way things are, I don't!
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Edward L. McKeever : A-ha!
Laura Partridge : What's a-ha?
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Edward L. McKeever : You know, all of the sudden I have the feeling I want to kiss you.
Laura Partridge : You do? Well...
Edward L. McKeever : I'm sorry. What an idea. Wanting to kiss you in your office.
Laura Partridge : Oh, it's all right. I'm on my lunch hour.
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Edward L. McKeever : I should have fired him 15 years ago, when I caught him taking home paper clips.
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Edward L. McKeever : That's it! We can get them out for committing a criminal act! They did *send* you to Washington.
Laura Partridge : Yes.
Edward L. McKeever : They bought you clothes, gave you an airplane ticket. Sent you to pressure me into giving them government contracts.
Laura Partridge : That's right.
Edward L. McKeever : Will you testify to that in court?
Laura Partridge : Of course!
Edward L. McKeever : Then, we've got 'em! There happens to be a law against that, Laura! A federal law!
Laura Partridge : I know! The Mann Act!
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Edward L. McKeever : I think you'll be comfortable here for the night.
Laura Partridge : Will I! And how'd you ever dig this up?
[holds up a sheer black nightgown]
Edward L. McKeever : One of my military aides got it. He probably requisitioned it from his wife.
Laura Partridge : Oh, this never belonged to any wife.
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Laura Partridge : A-ha!
Edward L. McKeever : What do you mean, a-ha?
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Laura Partridge : Listen, this could be a picture of an actor.
Edward L. McKeever : It's a picture of just what I am. An ex-grease monkey who got lucky.
Laura Partridge : No, this could be - William Holden.
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Edward L. McKeever : Do what I tell you, and be quick about it!
Laura Partridge : Now, McKeever, that's what I call *love* talk.