Charlie Brown's All Stars! (1966 TV Short)

Christopher Shea: Linus van Pelt

Quotes 

• Charlie Brown : Linus, give us the scouting report on the other team.

  Linus : I watched this team practice, see. They were terrible! Anybody could beat them. None of their players can hit the ball out of the infield. And they have this loud mouth girl in center field who can't catch a thing. They also have some animal at second base who can't even throw, and their pitcher is a kind of round-headed kid who is absolutely no good at all. And...

  Everyone : YOU SCOUTED YOUR OWN TEAM!

• [last lines] 

  Charlie Brown : Why are you looking at me like that?

  Linus : [wailing]  They made your uniform out of my blanket!

• Linus : [to the girls about Charlie Brown's decision, which they were complaining about]  Well, if you must know, Charlie Brown was only thinking about your feelings.

  Lucy van Pelt , Patty , Frieda , Violet : What do you mean our feelings?

  Linus : Well, the only reason Charlie Brown turned Mr. Hennessey down was because he'd have to get rid of Snoopy and you girls. Mr. Hennessey said that the league wouldn't accept girls and dogs on a team.

  [Upon hearing this the girls all look at each other in shock, and Snoopy breaks down crying] 

  Schroeder : I think we were pretty rough on Charlie Brown. You girls are very thoughtless. Don't you think Charlie Brown has feelings? All of you are the most thoughtless bunch I've ever known! You don't care anything about Charlie Brown! He's been loyal to you because he thinks you're his friends. But do you ever act like friends? No! Those uniforms meant as much to Charlie Brown as they did to you! Probably more!

  [the girls and Snoopy become sad and guilty] 

  Frieda : I feel terrible.

  Violet : But what can we do?

  Lucy van Pelt : Hey, maybe we can make it up to Charlie Brown by making him a uniform.

  [Looks at his blanket and realizes what he said as he tightly hugs his blanket] 

  Linus : Yes, that might pep him up, but we don't have any material.

  Lucy van Pelt : [Smiles evilly]  Oh, yes, we do.

  [Takes Linus' blanket and leaves with the girls and Snoopy] 

  Lucy van Pelt : Give me that stupid blanket.

  Linus : Aaugh!

• Charlie Brown : For one brief moment victory was within our grasp.

  Linus : And then the game started.

• Sally Brown : Don't I look cute in my bikini?

  Linus : [dryly]  Nope.

  Sally Brown : Don't I look like a beach bunny?

  Linus : Nope.

  Sally Brown : Isn't he the cutest thing? He never says what he means.

• [after Snoopy wipes out on his surfboard in Linus' kiddie pool] 

  Linus : Who wants to apply mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?

  [beat] 

  Sally Brown : Bleah!

• Charlie Brown : Well, tomorrow starts another baseball season and...

  Linus : I've worked up a few statistics about our baseball team, Charlie Brown. I think you'll find they have something to say to all of us.

  Lucy van Pelt : I'll *bet* they have a lot to say!

  Charlie Brown : What do they have to say?

  Linus : Well, last year, our opponents scored 3,000 runs to our total of six runs. They made 4,900 hits to our 11 hits. And they made four errors to our 375 errors. And while we were losing 999 straight games, we...

  Charlie Brown : I don't think I'm gonna get much sleep tonight.

• Violet : It's coming down, Charlie Brown!

  Lucy van Pelt : The fly ball is coming down!

  Charlie Brown : If I catch it, I'll be the hero. If I miss it, I'll be the goat. I can hear it now. "Charlie 'The Goat' Brown".

  [the ball lands in Charlie Brown's mitt, but drops] 

  Violet , Lucy van Pelt , Linus : AAUGH!

• Violet , Linus , Lucy van Pelt : It's a high-fly ball!

  Violet : Catch it, Charlie Brown!

  Linus : Catch it!

  Violet : Have you got it, Charlie Brown?

  Linus : Don't miss it!

  Lucy van Pelt : Get under it, Charlie Brown!

  Violet : Isn't this exciting?

  Linus : What if he drops it?

  Lucy van Pelt : If he drops it, let's all kick him!

• Charlie Brown : A hundred and twenty-three to nothing! Good grief! What a way to lose your first game of the season. By the way, where did everybody go?

  Linus : They all went off to cry.

  [sniffles] 

  Charlie Brown : *All* of them?

  Linus : All of them.

  [cut to Snoopy on his doghouse wearing his baseball cap] 

  Snoopy : Owooooo, owooooo!