- Gertrud: [Hamlet is discussing with his mother] What I am going to say now is not just a whim. You'll understand if you just want to. I loved your father as much as you can demand a good wife to love a tyrant who never returns love, giving you as much passion as he gives to the winter tires of his car.
- Hamlet: I ask you not to tarnish my father's memory.
- Gertrud: I've been silent too long to gloss over the facts.
- Gertrud: Then get to the point.
- Gertrud: I'm going to marry Klaus. I love him.
- Polonius: How are you, Hamlet?
- Hamlet: Alright, thank God.
- Polonius: Do you know me?
- Hamlet: Sure, You are the butcher.
- Polonius: No, I'm not.
- Hamlet: I wish you were.
- Polonius: Why?
- Hamlet: It would make you more respectable. Only one man in 10,000 is respectable and even he's nothing much to boast about.
- Polonius: That's true.
- Hamlet: For if the sun breeds maggots in a dead bitch it's worth the carrion to kiss it. You got a daughter?
- Polonius: Yes.
- Hamlet: Don't let her take too much sun, for it's nobler to give. Tell her about the facts of life or she might burst pregnant.
- Polonius: You're talking about my daughter? In my youth I, too suffered much for love. Almost just like you. What are you reading?
- Hamlet: Words, words, words.
- Polonius: About what?
- Hamlet: About it.
- Polonius: I mean: what's in the magazine?
- Hamlet: Gossip. Even if it was true, it's disgusting to print it because one day you'll be as old as I am, if you go backward like a crab.
- Polonius: I see. I must go. Will we meet again?
- Hamlet: I can't promise you anything else with as much pleasure, butcher except mu life, except my life, except my life.
- Polonius: Mad!