GoldenEye (1995)

Pierce Brosnan: James Bond

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Quotes 

• James Bond : Are these pictures live?

  M : Unlike the American government, we prefer not to get our bad news from CNN.

• M : You don't like me, Bond. You don't like my methods. You think I'm an accountant, a bean counter more interested in my numbers than your instincts.

  James Bond : The thought had occurred to me.

  M : Good, because I think you're a sexist, misogynist dinosaur. A relic of the Cold War, whose boyish charms, though wasted on me, obviously appealed to that young woman I sent out to evaluate you.

  James Bond : Point taken.

• Alec Trevelyan : [hanging from his foot held by Bond's hands]  For England, James?

  James Bond : No. For me.

  [lets Trevelyan go] 

• Alec Trevelyan : We're both orphans, James. But while your parents had the luxury of dying in a climbing accident, mine survived the British betrayal and Stalin's execution squads. My father couldn't let himself or my mother live with the shame. MI6 figured I was too young to remember. And in one of life's little ironies, the son went to work for the government whose betrayal caused the father to kill himself and his wife.

  James Bond : Hence Janus. The two-faced Roman god come to life.

  Alec Trevelyan : It wasn't God who gave me this face! It was you, setting the timers for three minutes instead of six.

  James Bond : Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?

  Alec Trevelyan : No. You were supposed to die for me.

  [pause] 

  Alec Trevelyan : And, by the way, I did think about asking you to join my little scheme but somehow I knew, 007's loyalty was always to the mission, never to his friend.

  [louder] 

  Alec Trevelyan : Closing time, James! Last call.

  [Bond raises his gun to kill Alec but is tranquilized by a sniper] 

  Alec Trevelyan : [walks towards Bond and looks down on him]  For England, James.

• Jack Wade : Jack Wade, CIA.

  James Bond : James Bond, stiff-ass Brit.

• [Q has blown up a dummy with an explosive pen] 

  Q : Don't say it...

  James Bond : The writing is on the wall.

  Q : Along with the rest of him.

• Alec Trevelyan : In 16 minutes and 43 sec - in 42 seconds, the United Kingdom will reenter the stone age.

  James Bond : A worldwide financial meltdown. And all so mad little Alec can settle a score with the world, 50 years on.

  Alec Trevelyan : Oh, please James, spare me the Freud. I might as well ask you for the vodka martinis that have silenced the screams of all the men you've killed... or if you find forgiveness in the arms of all those willing women, for all the dead ones you failed to protect.

• Natalya Simonova : Do you destroy every vehicle you get into?

  James Bond : Standard operating procedure. Boys with toys.

• [Bond and Natalya are trying to escape from the train when Trevelyan talks to them on the loudspeaker] 

  Alec Trevelyan : Good luck with the floor James. I've set the timers for six minutes, the same six minutes you gave me. It was the least I could do for a "friend".

  [snickers] 

  Natalya Simonova : What does he mean?

  James Bond : We've got three minutes.

• James Bond : Who is the competition?

  Jack Wade : Ah, an ex-KGB guy. Tough mother. Got a limp in his right leg. Name's Zukovsky.

  James Bond : Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky?

  Jack Wade : Yeah, you know him?

  James Bond : I gave him the limp.

• James Bond : Banco. It appears we share the same passions: three, anyway.

  Xenia Onatopp : I count two: motoring and, uh, baccarat.

  [James reveals a losing hand] 

  Xenia Onatopp : I hope the third is where your real talent lies.

  James Bond : One rises to meet a challenge.

• Dimitri Mishkin : Good morning, Mr. Bond. Sit. I'm Defense Minister Dimitri Mishkin. So, by what means shall we execute you, Commander Bond?

  James Bond : What, no small-talk? No chit-chat? That's the trouble with the world today. No one takes the time to do a really sinister interrogation anymore. It's a lost art.

  Dimitri Mishkin : Your sense of humour does not sway me, Commander, I'm sorry. Where is the GoldenEye?

  James Bond : I assumed you had it.

  Dimitri Mishkin : I have an English spy, a Severnaya programmer and a helicopter stolen...

  James Bond : ...or at least that's what some traitor in your government wanted it to look like.

  Dimitri Mishkin : Who was behind your attack on Severnaya?

  James Bond : WHO HAD THE AUTHORIZATION CODES?

  Dimitri Mishkin : RUSSIA MAY HAVE CHANGED BUT THE PENALTY FOR TERRORISM IS STILL DEATH!

  James Bond : AND WHAT'S THE PENALTY FOR TREASON?

  Natalya Simonova : Oh, stop it, both of you! Stop it! You're like boys with toys!

• Caroline : I enjoy a spirited ride as much as the next girl, but...

  [a woman, Xenia Onatopp, pulls up alongside and smiles] 

  Caroline : Who's that?

  James Bond : The next girl.

• Q : A pen. This is a Class 4 grenade. Three clicks arms the four-second fuse, another three disarms it.

  [Bond takes the pen, clicks three times] 

  James Bond : How long did you say the fuse was?

  [Q takes the pen back and disarms it] 

  Q : Oh grow up, 007.

  James Bond : They always said the pen was mightier than the sword.

  Q : Thanks to me they were right!

• James Bond : [while talking about the incident at Savernaya]  They're not just criminals Valentin, they're traitors.

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : Well, what do you expect from a Lienz Cossack?

  James Bond : What?

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : This Janus, I've never met the man, but I know that he is a Lienz Cossack.

  James Bond : Group that worked for the Nazis against the Russians. Second World War.

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : You know your history, Mr. Bond. At the end of the war, they surrendered to the British, thinking they would help in waging war against the Communists. But, the British betrayed them, sent them back to Stalin, who promptly had them all shot. Women, children, entire families.

  James Bond : Not exactly our finest hour.

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : Still, ruthless people. They got what they deserved.

• Miss Moneypenny : You know, this sort of behaviour could qualify as sexual harassment.

  James Bond : Really. What's the penalty for that?

  Miss Moneypenny : Someday, you'll have to make good on your innuendos.

• Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : [as Bond points a gun to his head]  Walther PPK, 7.65 millimeter. Only three men I know use such a gun. I believe I've killed two of them.

  James Bond : Lucky me.

  [a gun is pointed at the back of Bond's head] 

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : I think not.

• Xenia Onatopp : Thank you, Mister...

  James Bond : The name's Bond. James Bond.

  Xenia Onatopp : Xenia Sergeyevna Onatopp.

  James Bond : Onatopp?

  Xenia Onatopp : Onatopp.

• [Q appears, wheelchair-bound with his leg in a cast] 

  James Bond : Morning, Q. Sorry about the leg. Skiing?

  [Q's leg "cast" fires a rocket across the room] 

  Q : Hunting!

• Xenia Onatopp : You don't need the gun, Commander.

  James Bond : Well, that depends on your definition of safe sex.

• Caroline : James, is it really necessary to drive quite so fast?

  James Bond : More often than you'd think.

• Alec Trevelyan : [grabs a machine gun that's on the ground but Bond puts his foot on it first]  Why can't you just be a good boy and die?

  James Bond : You first.

  [looks at Xenia] 

  James Bond : You, second. UP!

• James Bond : It's too easy.

  Alec Trevelyan : Half of everything is luck, James.

  James Bond : And the other half?

  [alarms begin to go off] 

  Alec Trevelyan : Fate!

• James Bond : Alec?

  Alec Trevelyan : Back from the dead. No longer just an anonymous star on the memorial wall at MI6. What's the matter, James? No glib remark? No pithy comeback?

• Alec Trevelyan : You're late, 007.

  James Bond : I had to stop in the bathroom.

  Alec Trevelyan : Ready to save the world again?

  James Bond : After you, 006.

  Alec Trevelyan : James, for England.

  James Bond : For England, Alec.

• James Bond : Vodka martini - shaken, not stirred. And for you?

  Xenia Onatopp : The same.

  James Bond : How do you take it?

  Xenia Onatopp : Straight up - with a twist.

• Natalya Simonova : He was a friend, Trevelyan?

  James Bond : Yes.

  Natalya Simonova : Now he's your enemy and you will kill him. It is that simple?

  James Bond : In a word, yes.

  Natalya Simonova : Unless he kills you first?

  James Bond : Natalya...

  Natalya Simonova : You think I'm impressed? All of you with your guns, your killing, your death. For what? So you can be a hero? All the heroes I know are dead. How can you act like this? How can you be so cold?

  James Bond : It's what keeps me alive.

  Natalya Simonova : No. It's what keeps you alone.

• Alec Trevelyan : James... what an unpleasant surprise.

  James Bond : We aim to please.

• Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : James Bond. Charming, sophisticated secret agent. Shaken, but not stirred.

  [Zukovsky and his men laugh] 

  James Bond : I see you haven't lost your delicate sense of humour, Valentin.

  [nods toward the stage] 

  James Bond : Or your need for an audience. Who's strangling the cat?

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : [looks towards the stage]  Strangling a cat?

  [Zukovsky looks over at Irina, who singing out of tune, then takes out his gun and shoots right between Bond's legs] 

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : That is Irina, my mistress.

  James Bond : Very talented girl. Tell her to go.

  [Zukovsky looks to the stage] 

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : Irina, take a hike!

• James Bond : Hmm, never seen you after hours, Moneypenny... lovely.

  Miss Moneypenny : Thank you, James.

  James Bond : Out on some kind of fashion assignment, dressing to kill?

  Miss Moneypenny : I know you'll find this crushing, 007, but I don't sit at home every night praying for some international incident so I can run down here all dressed up to impress James Bond. I was on a date, if you must know, with a gentlemen. We went to the theater together.

  James Bond : Moneypenny, I'm devastated.

• Jack Wade : [Talking about Natalya]  Did you check her out?

  James Bond : Head to toe.

• James Bond : [referring to Onatopp]  She always did enjoy a good squeeze.

• Jack Wade : Now, let me get this straight, Jimmy - you shot him in the leg, you stole his car, you took his girl and now you want Valentin Zukovsky to set you up with Janus?

  James Bond : Yes.

  Jack Wade : Well, what are you going to do, appeal to his heart?

  James Bond : No, his wallet.

  Jack Wade : Oh, that might work.

• [Trevelyan and Ourumov are holding Natalya hostage on the train] 

  James Bond : Ourumov, what has this Cossack promised you? You knew, didn't you? He's a Lienz Cossack.

  Alec Trevelyan : It's in the past.

  James Bond : He'll betray you! Just like everyone else.

  General Ourumov : Is this true?

  Alec Trevelyan : What's true is that in 48 hours you and I will have more money than God. And Mr. Bond here will have a small memorial service with only Moneypenny and a few tearful restaurateurs in attendance.

• [after 006 kisses Natalya] 

  Alec Trevelyan : Lovely girl. Tastes like... like strawberries.

  James Bond : I wouldn't know.

  Alec Trevelyan : I would.

• Natalya Simonova : On the train, when you told him to kill me, and that I meant nothing to you, did you mean it?

  James Bond : Yes. Basic rule: always call their bluff.

• Natalya Simonova : [Kissing in a field]  I suppose there's someone watching.

  James Bond : There's no one within twenty-five miles, believe me.

  Jack Wade : [Out of nowhere]  Yo, Jimbo!

• Xenia Onatopp : Enjoy it while it lasts.

  James Bond : The very words I live by.

• General Ourumov : This is General Ourumov. Come out with your hands above your head.

  James Bond : How original.

• James Bond : In London, April's a spring month.

  Jack Wade : Oh yeah? And what are you, the weatherman? I mean, for crying out loud... another stiff-ass Brit, with your secret codes and your passwords. One of these days you guys are gonna learn just to drop it.

• Caroline : I know what you're doing.

  James Bond : Really? What's that, dear?

  Caroline : You are just trying to show off the size of your... your um...

  James Bond : Engine?

  Caroline : Ego.

• Caroline : James, I want you to stop this car!

  James Bond : Really?

  Caroline : Stop this car at once!

  [Bond yanks the handbrake up and the car skids to a complete stop and moves in close to Caoline] 

  James Bond : As you can see, I have no problem with female authority.

  [Opens the car's dashboard where a bottle of Bollinger Grand Annee Champagne 1988 is chilling] 

  Caroline : James, you're incorrigible. What am I going to do with you?

  James Bond : Well, let's toast to your evaluation, shall we?

  [Kiss] 

  James Bond : A very - thorough - evaluation.

• James Bond : Why?

  Alec Trevelyan : Hilarious question, particularly from you. Did you ever ask why? Why we toppled all those dictators, undermined all those regimes, only to come home: "Well done, good job, but sorry, old boy, everything you risked your life and limb for has changed."

  James Bond : It was the job we were chosen for.

  Alec Trevelyan : Of course you'd say that, James Bond, her majesty's loyal terrier, defender of the so-called faith.

• James Bond : I trusted you, Alec.

  Alec Trevelyan : Trust? What a quaint idea.

• Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : So why did you not kill me?

  James Bond : Call it professional courtesy.

  Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky : [Drawing a gun]  Then I should extend you the same courtesy.

• M : Would you care for a drink?

  James Bond : Thank you. Your predecessor kept some cognac on the top...

  M : I prefer bourbon. Ice?

  James Bond : Yes.

• James Bond : Governments change... the lies stay the same.

• James Bond : [after leading her to Janus at gunpoint]  Well, I've had a lovely evening, you?

  Xenia Onatopp : Once again, Mr. Bond, the pleasure was all yours.

  James Bond : You'll understand if I don't call.

  Xenia Onatopp : I won't lose sleep over it.

  James Bond : [Karate-chops her neck, knocking her unconscious]  Sweet dreams.

• James Bond : What would I ever do without you?

  Miss Moneypenny : As far as I can remember, James, you've never had me.

  James Bond : Hope springs eternal.

• James Bond : [Bond points a pistol at Onatopp]  No, no, no. No more foreplay. Take me to Janus.

  Xenia Onatopp : [in Russian]  BLYAT!

• James Bond : [as soldiers blow up a door]  Shut the door Alec! There's a draft!

• Q : Right. Now pay attention, 007. First, your new car - BMW Agile 54 with gears. All points radar. Self destruct system. And, naturally, all the usual refinements. Now, this I'm particularly proud of - behind the headlights, stinger missiles!

  James Bond : Excellent, just the thing for unwinding after a rough day at the office.

  Q : Need I remind you, 007, that you have a licence to kill, not to break the traffic laws.

• [last lines] 

  Jack Wade : Maybe you two would like to finish debriefing each other at Guantanamo, hmm?

  James Bond : You ready?

  Natalya Simonova : I'm not going on a helicopter with you. No plane. No train. Nothing that moves.

  James Bond : Darling, what could possibly go wrong, eh?

• James Bond : I'm alone.

  Alec Trevelyan : Aren't we all?

• James Bond : The things we do for frequent flyer mileage.

• James Bond : What words do you live by?

  Xenia Onatopp : The trick is to quit while you're still ahead.

  James Bond : That's one trick I've never learned. Perhaps you'll show me how it's done.

• Natalya Simonova : Don't stand there, get us out of here!

  James Bond : Yes sir.

• Natalya Simonova : Maybe I should take care of the transportation for our trip to Cuba.

  James Bond : Our trip?

  Natalya Simonova : Do you know how to disarm the weapon?

  James Bond : I suppose that depends on what kind of weapon you're talking about disarming.

• Jack Wade : Hello, Jimbo! Well, a little gift from ol', eh, what's his name? T? Z?

  James Bond : Q.

• Natalya Simonova : [after escaping from the train]  Do you destroy every vehicle you get into?

  James Bond : Standard operating procedure. Boys with toys!

  Natalya Simonova : Hmm. Maybe I should take care of the transportation for our trip to Cuba.

  James Bond : Uh huh. Our trip?

  Natalya Simonova : Do you know how to disarm the weapon?

  James Bond : I suppose that depends on what kind of weapon you're talking about disarming.

  Natalya Simonova : So, tell me, are there any other standard operating procedures I should be aware of, Commander?

  James Bond : Thousands. But I only pay them lip service.

  [They kiss] 

• [first lines] 

  [Russian in toilet cubicle looks around his newspaper to see Bond hanging from the ceiling] 

  James Bond : Beg your pardon, forgot to knock.

• Jack Wade : Come on, my car's over there.

  James Bond : After you.

  Jack Wade : Thank you.

  [comes up after Jack Wade and traps him with the car door and draws his gun on him] 

  James Bond : Like you said, "Drop it".

  Jack Wade : All right, in London April is a spring month, whereas in St. Petersburg we're freezing our butts off. Is that close enough for government work?

  James Bond : No. Show me the rose.

  Jack Wade : Please, no.

  [Bonds shoves his gun into Wade] 

  Jack Wade : Alright, alright, alright.

  [Wade unbuckles his pants and shows him his rose tattoo with the name "Muffy"] 

  James Bond : Muffy?

  Jack Wade : Third wife.

• [Xenia Onatopp approaches James Bond] 

  James Bond : That's close enough.

  Xenia Onatopp : Not for what I have in mind.

• Q : A typical leather belt, size...

  James Bond : Q, I'm familiar with that device.

• James Bond : Your accent - Georgian?

  Xenia Onatopp : Very good, Mr. Bond. You've been to Russia?

  James Bond : Not recently. I used to drop in occasionally. Shoot in and out.

• [Natalya is trying to find Boris' location while Bond cuts a hole in the floor of the train] 

  Natalya Simonova : [referring to Boris' password]  What else do you call your bottom?

  James Bond : What?

  Natalya Simonova : It's Boris' password; he plays word games. It's what I sit on but I don't take it with me.

  James Bond : Chair.

  Natalya Simonova : Like I said.

  [Starts tracing Boris' location] 

  James Bond : [breaking a hole in the train compartment floor with his foot]  Thirty seconds!

  Natalya Simonova : He's not in Russia, Germany, Paris, London, Madrid...

  James Bond : Twenty-five seconds!

  Natalya Simonova : ...New York, Toronto, Chicago, San Francisco...

  James Bond : Twenty seconds!

  Natalya Simonova : ...Mexico City, Rio, Miami...

  [Bond breaks a hole in the floor of the train and grabs Natalya by the arm] 

  James Bond : Come on!

  Natalya Simonova : Wait, he's in Cuba. Havana...

  [the trace is terminated] 

  Natalya Simonova : ...No!

  James Bond : Now!

  [Bond and Natalya escape from the train with seconds to spare before the train explodes] 

• Natalya Simonova : Who are you?

  James Bond : I work for the British government. The more you tell me the more I can help you.

• Jack Wade : Are you sure you want to do this? The last guy who dropped in uninvited went home air freight - in very small boxes.

  James Bond : Make sure they send me home first class.

• Natalya Simonova : Do something, get us out of here!

  James Bond : I'm a little tied up! Never mind...

• Natalya Simonova : So, tell me. Are there any other standard operating procedures I should be aware of?

  James Bond : A thousand. But I only pay them...

  [Natalia and James kiss] 

  James Bond : ...lip service.

• James Bond : You break into the Bank of England via computer, and transfer the money electronically. Just minutes before you set off the GoldenEye, which erases any trace of the transactions. Ingenious.

  Alec Trevelyan : Thank you, James.

  James Bond : But still, it boils down to petty theft. In the end, you're just a bank robber. Nothing more than a common thief.

• Alec Trevelyan : Closing time, James. Last call!

  James Bond : Buy me a pint.

• James Bond : After you, Moneypenny.

  Miss Moneypenny : No, I insist. You first.

• M : So - GoldenEye exists.

  James Bond : Yes.

• M : What else do we know about the Janus syndicate?

  James Bond : Top flight arms dealers headquartered in St. Petersburg. First outfit to restock the Iraqis during the Gulf War. The head man's unreliably described. No photographs. The woman - Onatopp - is our only confirmed contact.

• James Bond : Trust me.

  Natalya Simonova : Trust you? I don't even know your name.

• Alec Trevelyan : Situation analysis: hopeless. You have no backup. No escape route. And I have the only bargaining chip.

  James Bond : Where is she?

  Alec Trevelyan : Ah, yes. Your fatal weakness.

  [On a walkie-talkie] 

  Alec Trevelyan : Ourumov, bring her in.

• Alec Trevelyan : For England, James?

  James Bond : No. For me!

  [Bond let's go of Trevelyan's foot and Trevelyan falls] 

• Boris Grishenko : [shouting at Natalya; shaking Bond's pen grenade in her face]  GIVE ME THE CODES, NATALYA! GIVE 'EM TO ME...

  James Bond : [James, who has been counting the number of clicks Boris as been doing with his pen, knocks Boris to the ground, causing the pen to fly into a vat of fluid below. Bond and Natalya duck just in time before the pen grenade explodes] 

• Natalya Simonova : But I don't know anything.

  James Bond : Then let's start with what you do know.

• James Bond : What are you doing here, Wade?

  Jack Wade : Uh, I am not here. The CIA has no knowledge, no involvement. Absolutely nothing to do with your insertion into Cuba. If you catch my drift?

• James Bond : I like a woman who enjoys pulling rank.

  Xenia Onatopp : Nice to meet you - Mr. Bond.

  James Bond : The pleasure, I'm sure, was all mine.

• [Jack Wade borrows Bond's BMW] 

  James Bond : Don't push any of the buttons in that car.

  Jack Wade : I'm just gonna go bombing around in it.

  James Bond : Exactly.

• James Bond : Well, I must say, I've had a lovely evening. You?

  Xenia Onatopp : Once again the pleasure was all yours.

• Q : Now, a typical leather belt... male, size 34 buckle, notch.

  [Bond is playing with a computer] 

  Q : Are you finished?

  [Bond closes the laptop] 

  James Bond : Yes.

  Q : Good. A typical leather belt...

• James Bond : Governments change. The lies stay the same.

• Jack Wade : Will you hand me that wrench, Jimmy?

  James Bond : So, what do you know about Janus?

  Jack Wade : Zilch!

• James Bond : What do you think the Russians are using the base for?

  Bill Tanner : Well, at one point we suspected Severnaya might be the ground station for a secret space-based weapons program called GoldenEye, but...

  M : Our statistical analysis saw they had neither the finance nor technology to implement it.

  James Bond : Numbers were never my strong suit.

• Caroline : [after Bond revealed a bottle of champagne to Caroline, his beautiful but uptight evaluator]  James, you're incorrigible.

  [she begins to relax a little] 

  Caroline : What am I going to do with you?

  [she moves in to kiss him] 

  James Bond : [before Bond does the same, he puts his arm around Caroline first]  Lets er... toast to our evaluation, shall we?

  [they begin to kiss and Caroline starts to succumb to his charms] 

  James Bond : A very thorough evaluation.

  [Caroline giggles dreamily]