Evolution (2001)
Seann William Scott: Wayne
Photos
Quotes
-
Wayne Grey : [trying to get the alien's attention with an open mike] Ca-Caw! Ca-Caw! Ca-Caw! Ah Ah Ee Ee Tookie Tookie! Tookie Tookie! Ca-Caw Ca-ca-caw-ca-caw-caw-caw! Ca-ca-caw!
Harry Block : Wayne, I think we've established that "Ca-Caw Ca-Caw" and "Tookie Tookie" don't work.
Wayne Grey : Right. Sorry.
Harry Block : Alright, so what do you say Ira? Pack it in?
Wayne Grey : [starts singing into the mike] You are so beautiful, to me...
Ira Kane : Step back, Harry, I'm gonna shoot him.
Harry Block : No, stand down. I'm gonna kill this one myself.
Wayne Grey : Give me a chance, I'm communicating here.
[continues singing]
Wayne Grey : You are so beautiful, to me...
Harry Block : Wayne, would you please stop, because you are embarrassing me.
Wayne Grey : [Wayne starts singing louder and directly to Harry] Can't you see. You're everyth...
[the creature reacts]
Wayne Grey : [singing] You're everything that I hope for.
[the creature reacts again]
Ira Kane : It's working!
Harry Block : [to Wayne] Yeah. Sing! Sing! Rub some funk on it!
-
Ira Kane : Ira Kane, head of the science department, Glen Canyon Community College.
Harry Block : Harry Block, United States Geological Survey.
Wayne Grey : Wayne Grey. I took some chemistry in high school.
-
[they see a dying monster coughing something up]
Wayne Grey : Whoa! It's like a big lugie!
[the 'egg' breaks, and another monster comes out]
Harry Block : Mazel tov! It's a boy!
-
Harry Block : You going to finish that bacon?
Wayne Grey : Yeah, I am. I ordered it, didn't I?
-
[first lines]
[At night, Wayne drives out to a shack in the desert and places a mannequin inside it. He is wearing a yellow fireman's coat, without a fire department's name on it]
Wayne Grey : Despite all the warnings, she was smoking in bed, fell asleep. Bad move.
[He sloshes gasoline inside the shack and strikes a match]
Wayne Grey : And the fire begins. Showtime!
[Hollering in fake excitement, he charges into the shack]
Wayne Grey : Don't worry, ma'am, I'm here to save you!
[He pulls the mannequin out, then shouts to an imaginary crowd:]
Wayne Grey : Keep those people back! This is an emergency!
[He dumps the mannequin on the ground, pulls his coat off, and pretends to start CPR]
Wayne Grey : Don't you dare die on me! Breathe, dammit, breathe! She's gonna make it! She's gonna make it!
[Looking up triumphantly to the imaginary crowd, he sees the asteroid in the night sky, heading straight toward him]
Wayne Grey : What the - ?
-
[Lieutenant Cryer has interrupted the briefing of the Governor to call attention to the command site's video monitors]
Governor Lewis : [angrily] All right, what's going on down there?
[Another video monitor reveals a Bigfoot-like creature skulking toward the camera with a menacing expression]
Ira Kane : My God. They've evolved into primates.
Wayne Grey : Aughh. Now, that's a face for radio!
-
Wayne Grey : [as they arm themselves in the sporting goods store] You ever use one of these things before?
Harry Block : Just 'cause I'm a schoolteacher, that don't make me a pussy.
Ira Kane : Ladies, ladies, there's a terrifying alien bird menacing the mall. Can we focus?
