Carnage Road (Video 2000) Poster

(2000 Video)

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1/10
Don't be fooled!
Lucky__Boy18 December 2002
While wandering through the new release section of my local video-store I saw this movie on the shelf and thought it might be interesting...all I can say is that I was reminded again of the old adage "never judge a book by its cover". There are several quotes on the box-cover from people making cryptic compliments such as "The best movie that director Max Cerchi has ever shot" which I sincerely hope reads in its entirety "This is a terrible film, but sadly it is the best movie that director Max Cerchi has ever shot". Also, several of the quotes are from web-sites, and I have yet to establish if they actually exist. If by some miracle these web-sites do somehow exist, I find it amazing that someone in their right mind would endorse this joke.

I understand that the budget for this miniscule, but come on, budget constraints don't need to limit all originality. Every single "Legendary murder" by Quiltface is done either off-camera or is simply a fake machete held against someone and wiggled for effect. It was hilarious the first time, but when they used the same trick 5 more times it became clear that the makers weren't even going to try and do something interesting. The camera-work was a joke, low-budget or not...I mean at least try framing a few shots here and there. The acting was pretty bad, but I wasn't expecting much here...though I must say hearing the lead male character's high-pitched screams for the last 10-15 minutes had me close to shutting off the movie. It was so unbelievably annoying, it just fit perfectly with the rest of this sorry excuse for a film.

But perhaps this film is of some importance, as it should inspire anyone with a video camera to run to the desert to make a slasher flick, because they cannot possibly do worse than this. Please do not think that I am saying this film is "so bad it is good", but rather trying to emphasize that this film is "so bad it is just plain bad."
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1/10
Worst of the Worst- Coming from one who usually likes the Worst
Allan-1427 July 2002
This is the worst film I have seen in a very, very long time. Perhaps EVER. As an independent filmmaker (currently at work on my first major feature length movie, CONQUEST OF AREA 52), I know how hard it is to make movies with little to spend. But I was making better movies as a Sophomore in high school with $50 in my wallet as a budget than this pathetic excuse for a "movie." I'm not sure if I have ever seen a movie shot this poorly or with such little ambition, creativity, or craft. It looks like it was shot on Hi-8 Video (I shoot in DV and would be shocked if this was actually DV), and to no good effect. The "props" and "mask" in the film look very familiar... like I just saw them at my local Spencer's. The script lacks wit, and the performances do nothing to help it. And did I mention this has got to be the WORST camerawork I have ever seen (with the exception of BLAIR WITCH, which was SUPPOSED to look the way it did, and my family's home movies)?! There is no sense of logic or craft to how it was shot, whoever was at the helm must have been asleep at the wheel or he really just did not care what it looked like. There is no indication in this film that the cameraman had any idea what words like "framing" or "composition" meant.

The fact that our serial killer Quiltface is able to stand 20 feet from several people in the middle of the open desert and not be seen does NOT work in any fashion- camp nor horror- and best explains the rest of the movie.

I'm sorry, makers of "Carnage Road" (or "Carnage: The Legend of Quiltface" as the video cover says), but if you ever go out and try to make a movie again, please, PLLLEEEEASE do it with a little care, if not TALENT.

At least Ed Wood could have made this fun to watch.
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3/10
Not the worst...but close!
whammy66615 January 2006
I bought this movie at a local video store for a measly 3 bucks. I thought it would be hilarious, I had seen the trailer for it on the Terror Toons tape I recently rented, and I was starting to get into Brain Damage Film's trashy movies. Well, this movie isn't even really bad in a funny way, it is just...bad. Some of the kills are funny, because they look so fake. I don't know what they used for blood in this movie but it looks like red colored water. Not even think, just red water. And the main guy screams like a girl, starts off hysterical but gets old really quick. Also, Quiltface is hilarious...you can see where his mask ends, that is classic. Also, the guy who takes them over to the desert or whatever and warns them about the "Legend of Quiltface" is also hilarious. What a moron. And quiltface, leatherface? See a connection? Only watch if you are a really big sucker for bad movies with guys who scream like a 4 year old who wants to buy a toy bunny.
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Possibly the worst film ever
Katatonia21 July 2002
Ugh, don't waste your time on this piece of garbage. The acting is horrible, the plot is so thin it's invisible, the audio is nearly unintelligible most of the time. Why was this even made? I seriously doubt the budget was even $1000 for this. Yes, it's that bad. I love low-budget horror movies, but this is just so horrible it lacks any merits or entertainment. A pre-schooler could do a better film. Avoid this like the plague!
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2/10
What do you have to offer... I've got some candy
manicgecko20 May 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Turn down the lights, turn up the volume ... those words send shivers down my spine because after hearing those you know Brain Damage Inc is going to show you one of the worst movies ever made. And Quiltface is no exception. Basic plot - 4 college students go off into the desert inhabited by someone who didn't spend enough on his Halloween mask and is very upset with it's quality. Because of that he just stands in the desert and lets the kids walk by, trip, and the movie gets to perform its one and only special effect - the cleaver buried into flesh gag. Oh the good news, if you can stomach this movie long enough you get to watch Quiltface do a happy dance after one of these cleaving. Add in Hillbilly Jim (complete with his free energy machine)and some Diggery-doo and mouth harp music and this movie is just absolutely ridiculous. The worst part is just when you cheer for Quiltface knocking off the supposed stud who bawls like a baby - the movie goes on and you get to enjoy Richard's blubbering for more of this movie while he continues to wander aimlessly into the desert.

With the possible (slim chance) exception of Dead 7 - my advice is to avoid anything from Brain Damage, and Carnage/Quiltface is the perfect example why.
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3/10
Amazingly horrible low-budget slasher flick,but I have seen worse.
HumanoidOfFlesh18 May 2006
Four unlucky photography students head into the Nevada desert to take photos for an extra credit assignment,but they find themselves stalked by a vicious machete-wielding killer Quiltface who wears a mask made from human skin.Massimiliano Cerchi's "Carnage Road" is an incredibly poor slasher film filled with atrocious acting and stupid characters.The pacing is awful,the death scenes via machete are weak and the gore effects are amateurish."Carnage Road" plays like the homage to "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and "The Hills Have Eyes",but offers nothing fresh or interesting.Thankfully Mack Hail of "Nutbag" fame is amazingly funny as the driver who picks up four students and so is the final confrontation between Quiltface and the last survivor.Watch this only under the influence of alcohol.3 out of 10.
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1/10
How this isn't on the list amazes me!!
hottchopz14 June 2007
More people need to see this flick. Straight up. It is honestly the worst movie I have ever seen. I mean, I know kids in high school putting out better stuff than this. Please vote this in as number one. If you've seen it, then you can testify; horrible. Plain and simple. This is the type of film that makes Ed Wood's work look like Scorsese! The fact that I found this film by chance all the better. The only thing that sucks is that I threw it in the frigging dumpster right after I watched it. It was that bad.

Because looking back. I shouldn't have tossed it. I wish I could've saved this little anti-gem. Such an officious item should be cared for much better than that. I tell you just see it and tell me, honestly that you have seen anything worse. This thing could make Crossover look like Hoosiers. Sorry about all the metaphors, but to give a dissertation on this film would be pointless. It couldn't even use the simple, basic, run of the mill formula BS that has been used in horror flicks for aeon's now. How any producer could actually screen this and say; "Wow fellas this is an awesome movie. Lets actually try to sell this turd!" Come on! Crossover, Anne Beans and Franks Be Real. Whatever! You ain't got nothing on this!!
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2/10
Little "carnage", certainly not legendary, and Quiltface? Ha ha ha ha
gtc8316 March 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I picked this up for a buck and a half, expecting something, well, worth a buck and a half. But those expectations seemed far too lofty after viewing this thing. I can't imagine this took more than an afternoon to film, and between the acting, writing, directing, and camera-work, it's impossible to believe that anyone involved in this project has ever worked in the field of film making before, nor should they again.

Basically, four kids go out to the desert to do an extra-credit project for their photography class. We get lots of long shots - we're talking an entire minute - of this group slowly walking towards the camera. Have you ever used the 4X zoom feature on your DVD player to try to follow something around through an action sequence, using the arrow keys on your remote to keep the zoomed in image centered on what you want to see? That's what the camera-work in this movie reminded me of. As the kids walk from the right side of the screen to the left, the camera operator waits until they're almost out of the frame, then jerkily swivels the camera so that they're now on the right edge of the screen. They walk from one edge of the screen to the other, then we get another jerky movement to put them back on the right of the screen. This goes on for, as I said, and entire minute. Then the kids take a few pictures of each other standing in front of things, like a family on vacation would. This is for a photography class? Then they walk away. We see their entire journey.

My favorite laughable part in this thing is when Quiltface attacks two people. You know how damsels in distress tend to fall down when chased by a bad guy? We're treated to not one, not two, but THREE repetitions of this cliché in a row. Probably withing 60 seconds of each other.

Quiltface is a joke, wearing a rubber Halloween mask straight off the shelf at K-mart. The film makers obviously purchased one of those gag machetes with a piece cut out of the middle of it so that if placed against a person, it looks like it is embedded in them. Everyone in the movie gets this gag pulled on them, and we get to see the camera linger on these scenes for a humorously large amount of time. Our main character starts crying like a baby for the entire second half of the movie. This whole thing takes place in broad daylight, making any attempt at "horror" utterly laughable.

Overall, if you want a sure cure for insomnia, this might be just what you're looking for. Unfortunately I can't give it one star, because I have seen worse. But only in movies I've purchased for less than a buck and a half.
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1/10
Junk horror with a desert setting
Leofwine_draca18 March 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I watched this monstrosity under the title CARNAGE: THE LEGEND OF QUILTFACE. It's a shot-on-video piece of junk dating back to 2000 by director Massimiliano Cerchi, who has quite a career of directing films of this quality. Rather him than me. The tale is about a bunch of students who head off to an abandoned desert town for a photography project only to run afoul of a psycho living there.

You know the sort of film this is going to be with the early topless scene and bad acting. Very stupid, in other words. The killer is guy wearing the Michael Myers boiler suit with a rubber mask that looks ridiculous. He does embarrassing little dances after killing a victim that are copied from The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and look terrible. The desert setting is the only realistic thing about this. Elsewhere you get cheap gore, rubbish acting, and a production that is generally unremarkable in every respect.
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1/10
Boredom: The Legend of Low-Budget
UltimaGabe23 January 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Wow. Not many movies (since Camp Blood) have been this terrible. This, right here, is my poster example of a horrible movie. The plot makes no sense, the characters HAD to have been added in as an afterthought, and I'm tempted to think that whoever made this movie only had a vague idea of what movies were.

First off, let me just make one statement. This movie is about a random killer who stalks and kills people in the desert. That's right, a DESERT. You know, one of those barren locations with little or no landmarks, and NOTHING TO HIDE BEHIND. So many scenes in this movie (including the very first) involve the characters standing or walking by, thirty feet from the killer, who happens to be hiding behind NOTHING. He's just standing there. Sometimes, such as in the cast of the first scene, there's a six-inch tall tumbleweed and a strip of wood on the ground, not even tall enough to block the camera let alone an entire person, but apparently none of the characters noticed him.

Second, the characters are ridiculous. Four photography students- I don't even know if they're supposed to have met before this movie begins- all go out into the desert to take pictures. Alright, sounds okay so far. Except that none of them brought any food, water, or supplies for their day-trip into the DESERT. And, not even that, but ONE of them has a camera. I'm strongly tempted to believe that whoever directed this had never been to a photography class- or even knew what photography class was. Every time the characters "Stop to take pictures", do you think they take any that would be seen in a photography class? No. They take the kind of pictures you'd take on your vacation into the desert. (Nothing experimenting with lighting, no scenery shots, no nothing- all of their pictures are just the two girls standing in front of something, hugging, or whatever.) Third, the action scenes are terrible. What was with that scene where Quiltface walks towards them for five minutes as they stand in front of the camera shaking? It's just one shot, over-the-shoulder, as Quiltface takes his sweet time walking towards them. Didn't they think, during those five minutes, of, I don't know, walking away? He's not even moving very fast.

Fourth, it's quite clear that they got halfway through shooting and then couldn't think of how to end the movie. So, once all of the characters are dead, the one with the most grievous injury (the guy with the machete blow to the head, as opposed to the girl who got slashed in the side) gets up, somehow, and finds help. (And his injury gets smaller and smaller by the end of the movie, at which point it's gone entirely.) And it's also clear that they didn't want their special FX makeup to go to waste, as they hold each gore-shot for several more seconds than necessary (as the actor just sits there still).

Fifth, the movie ends after the one survivor rides away, in a vehicle, for at least an hour (we assume). And yet, somehow, Quiltface is there when the van stops for a potty break.

Avoid this movie. It's terrible. It's not the actors' fault, it's not the writers' fault, it's not the director's fault. It's the fault of whoever gave them funding for this garbage.
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2/10
Film school project
TrickTaylor13 September 2007
I must say that I hate these cheaply shot direct to video turds. They are most often found on the DVD multi-packs with 3 other crappy movies from the same company. On one hand I respect the little guys trying to make fun horror movies. I just wish they weren't so bad. This one is particularly awful. The acting, especially by the lead male, is ham at its worst. It is clear that the actors are given very little to work with, often asked to draw scenes out well beyond their logical conclusion. The premise of "quiltface" lacks any imagination at all, and we are given no reason to feel suspense, let alone horror. I'm not even sure why I am reviewing this as a normal movie. It plays like a sub-par film school project, and should be treated as such.
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10/10
Hilarious
hackdup4barbeque12 August 2003
Okay anyone who said this movie wasn't worth anyones time is a moron. this movie is ridiculous. Terrible acting (obviously terrible at that) and over the top cliché characters. This movie is some funny stuff. I suppose if your loking for a mochery movie than this is great. Quiltface is the "murderer" and probably has some of the funniest movements I have ever seen. All of Quiltface's attire and accessories can be purchased at your local holloween/party shop for a mere 30 bucks. You yourself could probably make this movie with a few friends and a few bucks. Knowing it was made on such a low budgit and knowing how much fun these people most likely had making this flick makes it even more fun to watch...so sit back and enjoy the CARNAGE(the legend of Quiltface)!!!
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7/10
More funny than scary
thetruefalcon20 May 2006
Warning: Spoilers
My friends and I went to great lengths to get our hands on this movie. All in all, it took about 4-5 hours for us to negotiate a membership at the local Hollywood Video. After spending 5 hours looking for a C-Movie, you think that you'd not want to see anything. This movie however, is definitely worth watching.

Not worth watching as a horror film, but as a comedy. The intro by the Brain Damage films guy is hilarious. His voice cracks, the lighting is terrible, but no money is spent trying to make anything better. "Gorehounds" love to have crap.

Take for instance, the fact that the main character gets stabbed in the head with Quiltface's machete. No way he would live. Oh he does.

I give this movie 7/10 stars. This is not for the horror aspect, but the fact that my friends and I had never laughed so hard. Vince Vaughn and all the other comedians need to talk to these guys and see how they do it.
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1/10
What a horrible waste of time
MrRamone42021 March 2018
Max Cerchi does not know how to direct a good film. He has also scammed a lot of people of money. I actually did not know where the story was going. avoid this movie at by all means
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Worst Movie Of 2000 (And That's Doing Something)
lordzedd-215 January 2003
This movie is so bad. One thing is this movie called "Carnage: Legend of Quiltface" or is it "Carnage Road". If you look closely. You will see that for some small changes it's a copy of "Camp Blood". Which stinks by itself. Not to mention the rotten ending. A horror doesn't have to have a bad ending just to be a horror movie. It's jsut sloppy writing, just to have a mess of sequels. Here's a hint. If it's made by "Brain Damage Films" then I pass if I were you.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being best)

I give "CARNGAE ROAD"

-100 STARS
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5/10
Load, baroque and Italian, I wouldn't have it any other way.
daniel-mannouch19 October 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Massimiliano (Max) Cerchi is a low budget genre film independent with now fifteen directorial credits to his name. Four of these were before Carnage Road, but honestly, you wouldn't have the scoobiest. Carnage Road in budget, skill and talent is an atypical so bad, it's good affair. It is unbelievable the combination of overkill performances and utterly artless cinematography. There are very few cuts to be found, very little coverage was taken for the obvious reasons and the result is on occasion a bunch of autistic teens screaming in a desert for a straight up uncut five minutes. Like the characters they are playing, the actors in Carnage Road are simply left to die in front of the camera.

All of this would signify the death nail for most films, but Carnage Road for all of its many faults has enough bravado to carry the film through its many, many dry patches. The girls are generously buxom and the guys are overly macho dicks. The trash aesthetic is very strong here and I appreciated that.

The best I can say is that Carnage Road has a found footage quality about itself, minus the found. As there is little editing at all in Carange Road, it becomes a hard film to describe as Massimiliano (Max) Cerchi holds shots for so long throughout this film, he makes Nicholas Winding Refn look like Michael Bay.

The intended vision was so obvious, yet the execution is so poor and so far away from the original intent, that Carnage Road does a complete bell curve and becomes ferociously entertaining through it's astounding ineptness. A rare breed indeed and is certainly a keeper.

In conclusion, it is astounding for me that Carnage Road is not on the iMDB bottom 100, although as that list is looking more and more each month like it was edited by a Buzzfeed employee, i'm not really all that surprised. This is truly mesmerising trash that features bewildering performances, camerawork that might break your sanity and it's all done with the most sincere purpose. Viva Italia.
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7/10
Could have used more Carnage.
milkhole21316 November 2022
Carnage: The Legend of Quiltface is a grimy, rotgut, redundant slasher from very marginal cult horror director Massimiliano Cerchi who also did Satan Claus and Hellinger. This also has involvement from both Polonia brothers back in happier times when John was still around. The movie starts with two idiots going out to the Nevada desert to take photos for a college class. The overly-freckly girl almost immediately gets topless and it turns into a sex scene with both participants wearing pants. They are hacked to death by titular killer with a prop machete which is used in all the kills here. After the credits we meet the main characters including a young couple. The girl showers and can't be bothered to show any nudity. She's played by the foxy young Molinee Green in her debut film, after this she would get over her shyness and spend the rest of her fairly lengthy career in the disgusting pornography industry. To quote Gen. Patton about the sham Nürnberg trials, "it's not cricket and is Semitic". Later on she would offer her body to Quiltface to save herself foreshadowing her later career of offering her naked body on screen to make a living. Most men of a certain ideological slant understandingly frown on pornography but that makes me wonder what they whack it to. Triumph of the Will? Tasteful nudes of Savitri Devi? Their collection of Castle Hill books? Next we are introduced to the other two main characters a vain, kind of attractive redhead and a dork she puts in his place by making him realize a pretty woman can only be interested in a man's bank account.

It turns out these are classmates of the two people slaughtered in the beginning and they are heading out to the barren desert landscape to take photographs instead of taking them of the Vegas strip like the rest of their class. Who wants to hang out in the hot desert when you can go play video slots with cool bonus games and craps with up to 100x odds? They are driven there by a surly, foul-mouthed guy who looks like he should be fronting a Pantera cover band. For the next while we get to watch them walk around and take a few photos of the not very exciting desert environs. Quiltface kills the dorky guy offscreen with a machete. Eventually the group is hacked down to one and it's unfortunately the foxy girl's boyfriend. He's pretty tough as he survives having the machete buried deep in his skull. It does affect him though as he spends the rest of the movie kind of stumbling around like an idiot while trying to survive the wrath of Quiltface and his accomplice, an ugly desert mountain man with a fat gut who can't afford a shirt with buttons. They are both 'Nam vets and Quiltface had his face shot off in that pointless war and the other guy made him a new face out of the faces of people stupid enough to wander into the barren desert. They are killing people due to being bitter over how the vets were treated after the war and are possibly some of McNamara's morons who according to some sources may have died by the hundreds of thousands in that war. It wouldn't be the first time modern wartime causalities were vastly under/over-stated. The film ends on a hopeless note, almost as hopeless as the lives of people who would watch something like this more than once.

As far as low rent slashers go this isn't too bad to me. You get a bit of nudity at the beginning, a few kind of bloody kills and a goofy but kind of scary killer and it's less than 70 minutes long. Nothing in this movie will make you think hard or feel any emotion but indifference which is what I want sometimes after a long day of reading about the depressing world we currently are trapped in. While the desert location isn't that unique it's still a nice change from all the backwoods slashers. The acting is pretty bad as expected with Mack Hail standing out as the surly van driver. One for the really hardcore slasher completionists whose wretched lives have long ceased to have any real meaning and are just kind of going through the motions until their (hopefully) early and unnoticed demise.
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Another 'Classic' by Brain Damage Films.
Johnnyinsanity23 January 2004
Warning: Spoilers
Ahhh. Where do I begin?

Carnage Road - The Legend of Quiltface... If you've never rented a Brain Damage film before, you may want to fast forward past the highly annoying dweeb who insists on explaining the 'plot' to each film, as if we're too damn stupid to figure it all out for ourselves.

As for the movie itself - MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS (God forbid).

It's about a group of kids heading out into the desert to do a school project of some sort. Let's not get into this part with any further details, because it's just like every other damn horror movie. Bad acting 30 year olds posing as teenagers.. Moving onto Quiltface himself - This may be the only killer who can cut halfway through a persons body by barely touching them with his rubber machete. Not to mention we don't HEAR the sound effects of this happening until about 2 seconds after it actually happens. Plus he can be standing in plain sight, without being seen. He moves likes he has a load in his pants, which could explain the excessive grunting throughout the film. My personal favorite scene, is where he 'kills' one of the females, and starts sniffing her armpits - Once he's finished, he stands up and starts doing some type of dance move. Something you'd see in a Village people concert. I'm not ashamed to say that I almost wet myself as this was taking place. The movie is worth seeing for that alone.

I recommend this ridiculous pile of crap, just so you can view possibly the worst 'villain' you will ever come across on screen.

4/10.
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6/10
I GOT SOME CANDY
nogodnomasters16 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
"Carnage Road" and "Carnage: The Legend of Quiltface" are the same film. They didn't bother to change the title inside of the film. In the newer updated Quiltface version there is an opening narrative by a man attempting to look and sound scary on a set lit with white tea candles. Apparently black candles would have blown the budget.

In this feature 4 students go to the desert to do some photography. Their driver informs them of the "Quiltface" legend because of possible copy right issues calling him "Leather Face." The movie develops two characters: the bus driver (Mack Hail) a foul mouth ex-military man and Mike (Sean Wing) a geek who claims he is not buck toothed but "toothly challenged." He hits on Amy (Melissa Brown) and walks around with his t-shirt tucked in.

At times the cheese was good. The overly irritating Mike and the banter between him everyone else made for a half decent "bad movie." However, Quiltface never took off. The killings consisted of a machete with no imagination. Writer, producer, director, Massimiliano Cerchi couldn't make 90 minutes out of it. The camera had the shakes, even when someone wasn't getting killed. Sometimes the film quality looked like a 70's VHS transfer.

This is basically a one star film which I gave 6 stars for Mike and the cheese.

Parental Guide: F-bomb, opening sex and nudity (Heidi Harrison)
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This film documents true raw talent in the Nevada desert
omenwear30 June 2002
After years of hard work as a prominent Director/Writer in Los Angeles, working with stars like Erik Estrada, Jan Michael Vinncent and Saban Entertainment I have seen hundreds upon hundreds of films.

Massimiliano Cerchi: has a raw talent that screams out from the very screen his movies play on. Carnage road shows, that Las Vegas is a Lost oasis of un-harnsed talent just waiting to explode! The Locations, acting and Direction show more than enthusiasm, but also radiant talent that could possibly make the million dollar leap into major distribution with companys like Artisan or Miramax.

After seeing this film I myself am convinced that Las Vegas is the new British Columbia of the future and Cerchi has shown us this with films like Hellinger and Carange Road.

I anxiously await to see the future that lies ahead of these talented digital filmmakers from the desert oasis known as Las Vegas Nevada, "Where I actually was born myself"

Show them more Massimiliano Cerchi,

Sincerely: Robert RUndle
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Max's best movie?
almaric18 February 2002
I was sitting with the director and he called this work his best movie. That's a statement I don't actually agree with, HELLINGER is a much better work. This one has much more camp value thanks to the scripting assistance of the Polonia Brothers. Fans of Micro-budger slashers take note, CARNAGE ROAD is one of the better slasher-with-a-gimmick efforts to come along recently.
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