DEVIL'S LITTLE ACRE is a complete mess of a movie. Deficient in every respect, naturally it got praised to the skies by the moron who shills on the back of the DVD-R box for Something Weird, which issued it on Volume 35 of its Dragon Art Theatre series. Contrary to XXX expectations, it is strictly softcore, with camera angles and the thesps carefully avoiding any explicit sex.
Sound is completely muffled, rendering the ad lib dialog unintelligible; most exterior scenes are completely washed out making viewing impossible, and there is an overall sloppiness which even bona fide hacks are never guilty of delivering. This falls in the bottom one percentile of crap.
Cretinous guys sit around shooting the breeze in overlapping dialog that might have given Robert Altman a hard-on but made me anxious. Anxious for some entertainment. That is delivered when the guys order up girls from the handy nearby Ozark Maid Service, where luscious and flat-chested at this time Rene Bond works. The first girl sent over is immediately gang-raped by the boys, setting the "light" tone desired by the morons who made this film.
It's more of the same, in very repetitious setups for nearly an hour. Climax is when our horny protagonists decide marriage is the only answer, cueing a ridiculous nude tableau of 3 couples having intercourse in varied positions while a preacher stands there. This dumb payoff is stretched out ad infinitum.
Cornpone bluegrass music comes onto the soundtrack occasionally but many of the sex scenes are just silent. Haphazard is the best description for this rickety excuse for a time-killer. Lead cretin vaguely resembles Johnny Depp. Lucky for Depp he paid his early career dues by working in horror films and on TV, rather than performing in softcore crap like fellow luminaries Sylvester Stallone and Kevin Costner did. Otherwise he might have shown up in sleaze like this baby.
2014 NOTE: Junker has been reissued on DVD by Alpha Blue Archives in an abbreviated 34-minute version titled OAKIE MAID to pad the running time of one of their new Ed Wood tribute collections.
Sound is completely muffled, rendering the ad lib dialog unintelligible; most exterior scenes are completely washed out making viewing impossible, and there is an overall sloppiness which even bona fide hacks are never guilty of delivering. This falls in the bottom one percentile of crap.
Cretinous guys sit around shooting the breeze in overlapping dialog that might have given Robert Altman a hard-on but made me anxious. Anxious for some entertainment. That is delivered when the guys order up girls from the handy nearby Ozark Maid Service, where luscious and flat-chested at this time Rene Bond works. The first girl sent over is immediately gang-raped by the boys, setting the "light" tone desired by the morons who made this film.
It's more of the same, in very repetitious setups for nearly an hour. Climax is when our horny protagonists decide marriage is the only answer, cueing a ridiculous nude tableau of 3 couples having intercourse in varied positions while a preacher stands there. This dumb payoff is stretched out ad infinitum.
Cornpone bluegrass music comes onto the soundtrack occasionally but many of the sex scenes are just silent. Haphazard is the best description for this rickety excuse for a time-killer. Lead cretin vaguely resembles Johnny Depp. Lucky for Depp he paid his early career dues by working in horror films and on TV, rather than performing in softcore crap like fellow luminaries Sylvester Stallone and Kevin Costner did. Otherwise he might have shown up in sleaze like this baby.
2014 NOTE: Junker has been reissued on DVD by Alpha Blue Archives in an abbreviated 34-minute version titled OAKIE MAID to pad the running time of one of their new Ed Wood tribute collections.