Project Viper (TV Movie 2002) Poster

(2002 TV Movie)

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3/10
"You know I can't get it up unless I take a leak, I'll be right back." Rubbish low budget horror/sci-fi.
poolandrews15 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Project Viper starts on a spaceship named the Olympus which is heading for Mars on a mission to deliver a genetically created organism named Viper which will terraform the planet & make it inhabitable for us humans. Unfortunately things go wrong & the entire crew end up dead & the Olympus ends up floating helplessly in space. NASA suspect a conspiracy & call in Mike Connors (Patrick Muldoon) to check things out & retrieve the other Viper from Novagen Industries where it was developed, however some very bad people want the sole remaining Viper & kill scientist Diane Cafferty (Lydie Denier) & replace her with someone who looks exactly the same. The impostor manages to gain access to the Novagen labs where she steals the Viper, despite the best attempts of Connors & the security guards she manages to escape. Connors job is now to track the Viper down & destroy it, he enlists the help of the Novagen scientists who created it, Nancy Burnham (Theresa Russell), Steve Elkins (Billy Keane), Sidney Bream (Tamara Davis) & Alan (Daniel Quin) to track it down. News soon reaches Nasa that a plane has crashed near a Mexican town & the Viper was definitely on board, by the time Connors gets there the Viper has disappeared, is on the loose & killing anyone it comes across...

When I discovered that Project Viper was directed by Jim Wynorski under his usual pseudonym of Jay Andrews my heart sank, I went from hoping that I was about to watch an entertaining sci-fi horror to just hoping I would stay awake for the duration & not lose the will to live. The tedious, slow-moving, unoriginal & overly serious script by Curtis Joseph & David Mason is standard low budget sci-fi crap that focuses on the deeply dull conspiracy theory's & double crosses rather than the films main selling point the genetically created creature thing which isn't even mentioned let alone seen for a good 30 minutes! The character's are dull & clichéd, the plot twists are extremely predictable & routine. It's never really explained how the Viper thing was created & Project Viper eventually descends into a bland alien killing random townspeople type film that there are literally 100's of already. There are so many better more worthwhile sci-fi monster films out there for anyone to be bothering with such a bland, boring, routine, unexciting & throughly predictable piece of low budget film-making.

Director Wynorski again turns in another forgettable slice of low budget nonsense. It has no style or visual flair & two of it's best scenes are in fact taken/stolen from Species (1995) & Air America (1990), I wonder if he's allowed to just take footage from another film & use it? The special effects aren't too bad actually, the opening shots of the spaceship orbiting the Earth are fairly impressive as is the scenes of the Viper chasing a jeep through some caves at the end, I was expecting worse. There's no gore in it, a couple of gory mutilated bodies & that's it.

I'm pretty sure the budget was low on Project Viper but that still doesn't excuse it from being bland & dull, it's reasonably well made but it's hardly going to win any awards. The acting was poor & nobody seemed liked they wanted to be there & had that 'what am I doing in this?' look on their faces, I can't say I blame them. Just to reassure actors everywhere there is life after a Jim Wynorski film as Russell has gone from this to having a role in the forthcoming Spider-Man 3 (2007) film.

Project Viper is crap, it's as simple & straight forward as that really. Not worth your time or money, there are far better films out there, one to avoid.
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4/10
Utterly silly and formulaic
MartianOctocretr521 July 2006
Viper is a man-made monster bred by some evil government agency, which is engaged in sinister covert operations etc., etc., you know the drill. Needless to say, the creature gets loose and starts feeding on people, starting with the ones who have few or no speaking lines, later going after credited cast members.

Patrick Muldoon as a government cop who beats up a lot of dudes, is one of the most annoying actors I've ever seen. I was rooting for Viper to hunt him down and shut him up. A scientist, played by pretty Teresa Russel, tries to help the obnoxious cop catch the thing before it eats everybody. She at least tries to act, but her lines are scatterbrained and more like a teen in a zombie flick, rather than a scientist.

The plot is deranged. The actions of the creature follow no consistent pattern; it does what is needed in any given situation. Sometimes it oozes on to its victim, killing slowly and discreetly, other times it smashes things down to get to its prey. Sometimes it chases people, other times it magically appears out of the ground and seizes them. Sometimes it's looking for water to survive, other times it's trying to sniff out radiation for its sustenance. Sometimes bullets hurt it, some time they don't. Some times it feels like a nut, sometimes it don't.

Corny and ridiculous from end to end, but possessing a so-bad-it's-good personality. It actually is an OK watch, just for the non-stop goofiness and action.
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5/10
Enjoyable 'B' level sci-fi/horror.
capkronos10 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Yes, this borrows ideas (and in some cases, actual scenes!) from other popular recent horror/sci-fi films, but that doesn't make this boring. In fact, it's actually pretty entertaining overall.

Astronauts aboard the spaceship Olympus, which is doing some work around Mars, have some major power surge problems right before they're about to do a live TV broadcast and are all presumed dead after contact with NASA is lost. It may have something to do with Project VIPER, an experiment mixing gene microbiology with computer technology and developed at Novagen Industries, a government run facility rife with corruption. Scientist Diana (Lydie Denier) is shot dead and replaced by an identical double who breaks into the lab, guns down a dozen or so people and escapes with the second VIPER prototype. She's involved in a plane crash near the Mexican border and the program, described by one character as "living, breathing acid," kills her and the pilot and escapes into the woods. Confused yet? Well I was too at first, but after the busy opening twenty minutes or so, this settles down quite nicely and becomes an entertaining little low-budget thriller, with horror and sci-fi elements.

The program creators; chief scientist Nancy Burnham (Theresa Russell), programmer Steve (Billy Keane), computer expert Sydney (Tamara Davies) and doctor Alan (Daniel Quinn), are teamed up with smart-ass, tough guy government agent Mike Conners (Patrick Muldoon) to stop the creature before it can multiply. Naturally, one of the five has intentionally tampered with the program and created a nearly unstoppable killing machine. Tim Thomerson has a nice supporting role as a cancer-stricken small town Springfield sheriff perplexed by the string of grisly murders in his town. The ever-growing creature impales and gobbles up victims whole, can mimic any molecular structure, is usually seen as a tentacled silver blob, leaves behind a metallic slime trail wherever it visits and hangs out in the small town because of the high uranium content in the water supply, which has also led to a high cancer rate in the town. Does that make this the horror movie answer to ERIN BROCKOVICH? Actually it sort of does now that I'm thinking about it; especially when Curtis Armstrong ("Booger" from REVENGE OF THE NERDS) shows up as a lawyer trying to get the townsfolk to sue the city. Regular viewers of Cinemax may want to note there's also a brief appearance by buxom Ohio native Lorissa McComas in a small supporting role.

Though a bit hard to follow at first, the story is passable, there's plenty of action (and explosions) and some welcome comedy. The production values, acting and special effects are all pretty good and it is one of more professional offerings from 'B' kingpin Jim Wynorski, who for some reason uses an alias ("Jay Andrews") for what turns out to be one of his best films. It debuted on the Sci-Fi Channel.
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1/10
the movie is total crap, Theresa Russell is awesome
mojo-obp1 August 2004
A DoD special agent is sent to investigate the failure of a space-shuttle just above earth. What seems to have killed the astronauts is a creature specially designed on Earth to perform terra-forming on Mars. Of course, as you already suspects, the creature doesn't just create vegetation in order to produce oxygen, it also has some nasty homicidal tendencies. Actually, it feeds on humans. So our special agent goes to meet the scientists who've created the monster to figure out a way to kill it. Again we don't have a full-on military strike, just one law-enforcement agent and a couple of scientists hunting what seems more dangerous than the T-Rex. Yeah, right. The creature settles in a small town in Illinois, where everyone is dropping dead from cancer, which is caused by their uranium-contaminated water purification system (the main water pump is in an old uranium mine, and nobody suspects anything in this town, although they had 38 deaths in 7 years, and over two thirds of the population suffering some form of cancer... another priceless thing in this movie). We also have a "traitor" in the team (it's an inside job, as they say). And yada yada, so on and so on. It's boring as hell, and you could really live better without watching this.

What makes this movie worth watching is Theresa Russell. She does her acting job as usual. But this time, she looks really sexy. I'm telling you, it doesn't matter that she's old. She is a real MILF. And she will certainly lead you through the movie, without switching it off.
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2/10
Seen it before, made on a shoe string.
matsondawson23 September 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I've set this as containing spoilers, but it's hard to spoil an already awful movie.

A cliché move with cliché roles done on a shoe string budget. The lack of money is obvious given the two scenes taken from other movies. The first scene a car crash down a hill taken from species, and the second a plane crash taken from Air America. There may have also been a third scene taken from Broken arrow of a mine exploding.

The actors aren't normally this bad but being hampered by the awful dialog I almost felt sorry for them. It's the actor job equivalent of stacking shelves at a super market.

The only reason I didn't vote this movie as (1)-Awful is because I actually watched it all, and if I had voted it (1) it would be saying it was as bad as Street Fighter.
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2/10
Utter Garbage
Theo Robertson25 September 2003
The title sequence features a space shuttle out in deep space which instantly reminded me of LIFEFORCE while the music used reminded me of ALIENS ( As one commentator suggested on this page it might actually be the soundtrack itself ) and all the way through PROJECT VIPER I couldn`t help but be reminded of set pieces I`d seen from other movies , but things go from bad to worse when an entire sequence is lifted from SPECIES , let me clarify that , the sequence didn`t remind me of SPECIES , it was stolen from the film itself and a couple of minutes later there`s another sequence stolen from AIR AMERICA ! I`ve said this before and I`ve saying it again : If you can`t make your own movie , then don`t bother making a movie . On top of all that because PROJECT VIPER uses action scenes from other peoples films the screenplay is very confused and disjointed
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5/10
An Average and Full of Clichés Action Movie
claudio_carvalho16 August 2003
A nasty security agent (Patrick Muldoon) and a sexy scientist from NASA (can you imagine Theresa Russell as a scientist?) try to find out what happened to a creature generated from human DNA and chip and raised in Mars that eats human flesh. This is an average and full of clichés action/ sci-fi movie, with some reasonable special effects. Theresa Russell as a fatal woman, whore, or detective character is acceptable, but as a NASA scientist seems to be too much for me. Forgettable and recommended only for a rainy day without any other option. My vote is five.
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Same old story
TC-421 April 2002
This is the same old story about an alien being taking over the earth.

I see this type of stuff each week on the X-Files done much better. Without telling any details for those who want to see it, there is nothing original about this. The CGI work to create the monster was the worst that I have ever seen. Patrick Muldoon who was the male star was possibly the worst actor that I have ever seen. I watched it because of the reputation of Theresa Russell but she looked lost in a very stupid movie. I watched it on the Sci-Fi Channel which had more commericials ever and lots of bleeps. This movie might have been passible as a late night movie on tape or dvd but not with edits, cuts and commercials.
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1/10
How NOT to make a movie...
Chromium_54 August 2005
I don't remember much of this movie, since I was watching it on vacation in Greece at like 3:00 in the morning. The fact that I couldn't bring myself to finish it even though it was the only English-language program on should tell you a lot right there. I do remember a lot of shockingly bad camera-work, editing, and acting... camera-work especially. It honestly looks like they gave the camera to a 6 year old and told him to follow the adults around. I remember in particular a chase scene through a hallway where the camera-work is so bad the characters aren't even in the frame half the time (this same chase scene, incidentally, is a good example of the awfulness of the plot, since it's started when a lady walks right up in plain view of a guy she's trying to spy on, then defends herself by saying she was "going for a walk." Hmm, yeah, I spend a lot of time going for walks in my living room too).

If the choreography isn't bad enough for you, there's also the lighting coming from bizarre angles in places where there shouldn't be any light, the cartoon CGI tentacles that pass for a monster, etc. As a movie, it's really boring, but it's a great example of not NOT to direct. If you are an aspiring director and want to improve, my advice is watch this movie. You could sit there for hours and take notes of what the director is doing wrong.

You could use the same technique to brush up on your acting skills. The actors here are vomit-inducingly awful. All of them just seem bored (understandably), even when something bad is supposedly happening to them, like tentacles going into their mouths and coming out their stomachs (by the way, user Billy Lovelady's comment about "tentacle hentai" is one of the funniest things I've ever read. Thank you, sir). Some of them are also plain weird, like the crazy hick neighbor and the sheriff who looks like Freddie Mercury at age 70.

Unless you're using this for study as I've suggested, avoid it at all costs. It's mindless and boring. There are millions of better things to do than watch this movie, such as looking out the window, which is what I did for the next hour after I turned it off. It was a hell of a lot more productive than waiting to see who killed the Viper.
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3/10
Apart from Theresa Russell, the music and a couple of decent effects, Project Viper is derivative, dull and takes itself too seriously
TheLittleSongbird24 August 2012
Project Viper could have been much worse than it was, and there have been both worse and better movies. There are redeeming qualities certainly. Theresa Russell does bring some charisma and grit to her femme-fatale sort of role as well as showing beautiful looks. The music doesn't really sound all that original, I agree that it was reminiscent of Alien, but it was memorable, it was haunting and it was suspenseful(a shame that the movie didn't live up to it). A couple of effects are decent, though both are crude and bizarre looking, but the ones in the opening scene and the viper chasing the jeep through the caves were not bad at all. However, I never found Project Viper thrilling or really all that unsettling either. The very derivative(there are scenes that do look as though they were lifted out of better stuff like It, Air America and Species) and disjointed storytelling, the talky and overly-serious in tone scripting, the laborious pacing, the clichéd and underdeveloped characters and haphazard filming really undermined any atmosphere Project Viper could have had that the music promised. Apart from Russell the acting is not great at all. Tim Thomerson is not too bad actually but is saddled with a stereotyped sheriff character that you just don't care for at the end of the day. Patrick Muldoon is the worst, he manages to be both annoying and bland. All in all, has its redeeming qualities but didn't do all that much for me. 3/10 Bethany Cox
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4/10
Disappointing
guidomaschio19 August 2002
The start isn't bad, but after the end you will find that this film has only two good things to offer: Theresa Russel and the musical score, (that is clearly cloned from the music of the memorable Ridley Scott's "Alien"). The remaining is the usual dull stuff. I found annoying the male protagonist that, in a story supposed to be serious, is acting like he was in a James Bond movie, with the difference that here the jokes appear to be really misplaced.

A movie to watch with an eye only, while you are doing something else.

4/10
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8/10
Excellent Quality, editing, audio, video & story
midge569 July 2018
Warning: Spoilers
This underrated movie had excellent Quality in every aspect except perhaps screenplay. The photography, Audio & editing are comparable in quality to any top rated scifi. It also had recognizable Stars like John Beck (Mark Grayson on Dallas). It also had some fairly decent effects.

The story was good regarding 2 engineered creatures from a CIA front company. One creature sent to Mars kills the astronauts. A second creature, stolen using sophisticated methodologies which gets loose. Inside job. Agents & developers sent to find it.

Here are the weak points in the screenplay. Dumb character behaviors such as putting their hands in creature goo, wearing no protection, having no weapons when sneaking up on it (such as a freeze gun or flame thrower or chemical deterrent) until the end.

Scientists can't describe their own creation, have no sense of urgency, have bad attitudes and are of no help, 3 ignore their own tracking device alerting the creatures presence, and go right where they shouldn't (even though they know it is there & just killed their teammates). The town is not evacuated & no military presence (probably lack of budget.) Town cop locks up gov't & NASA agent. Gov't agent is a bad version of a 007 wannabe (not the actors fault). The screenplay must have been written by an untrained neophyte.

Except for the screenplay, this movie is excellent quality. Better than the junk films getting hundreds of millions which can't compare to this underrated film. The critics sound like 10 year olds who trash things as bullies wanting attention. This film doesn't deserve the treatment this roving gang of underage neophytes & bullies are dishing out.

This movie was shamelessly included as one of two bonus movies on a DVD which was only listed after you started the DVD. Yet the real rotten movies far worse always seem to get their own DVD with great artwork & disappointment when you start them. There are bad movies, but this isn't one of them.

People also need to remember the actors are following a specific script, dialogue, behavior & setting. They are following script & direction. They do what they are told by the script & director. Not making it up as they go along.

Don't listen to people who deliberately trash good films like beating up a school mate just for the fun of it.

This came on an Asteroid DVD at Walmart. I highly recommend the film. Especially to those who loved 50's & 60's & 80's scifi. The story; reminds me of an Outer limits episode, The Voyage Home, in the 90's where a creature from Mars came back with the Astronauts (One was Michael Dorn, Worf from Star Trek). He was in that OL episode. Not this film. Their creature had a few more tricks but similar.

This film has better production quality than Alien Even better than the recent Star Wars film with Ford & Fisher.

This film has a recognizable cast & a decent story. If not for the screenplay with poorly written scenes. Actually, the scenes were good. It was the character behaviors in those scenes which were badly written. This could have been a top ten movie if they had been given enough budget for an upgraded creature.

I rarely rate movies this high.

Try it. If those of you over 40 like it, please share it.
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1/10
OMG...what happened?
jayymz29 November 2002
This was the worst ever! I loved the way they stoled the Air America Scene (When the plane goes down - This is the exact same scene used in Air America from one of the final scenes). How pathetic... I would recommend you sit off your time watching re-runs of old star trek episodes instead of this horrible crap!
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1/10
Not worth the Film it was filmed upon
Malleus_Chaosium20 March 2004
Not even 20 minutes into this movie , and i have already seen scenes stolen from another movie. "Species" .The Car chase and down the side of the Hill was taken Directly From it. The editing is Bad ... the acting Horrid. Yet again proving that No Talent is Required.

They Didnt even bother to Change the Hair color of the Woman jumping from the Same Blue Mustang before crashing into the Power Transformer.

the Driver has Brown hair but the woman jumping out Has Blonde (The Stunt double for Natasha Hensstridge in Species)

It is a shame that they apparently dont know how to use computers well enough to re-color the car and the Hair.

After 20 minutes I decided it was not worth my time, and turned to something better... QVC ... Just kidding ... but even that would be better than this garbage
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5/10
Science again has created something to fear.
michaelRokeefe20 April 2002
An outspoken security agent(Patrick Muldoon)is forced to team with a sexy NASA scientist(Theresa Russell)to capture a murderous creature on the loose. The snail-like creature was created from a fusion of human DNA and computer chips and seems to have a hunger for human flesh. This sci fi pictures orignal also stars Tim Thomerson, Billy Kean and Curtis Armstrong. I expected stronger and more interesting F/X. Pace of the story line is sustained by suspense. Recommended viewing. Catch it on the Sci-Fi Network.
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Plot holes galore! *spoilers*
Matthewwk13 September 2003
Warning: Spoilers
well i first watched this movie today and from what i read in the TV Guide listing , i thought it would be good. The premise of the plot seemed like a good one, but they just didn't write the story well enough for it to be considered a hit. I started to get bored of it and do other things for a little bit in the beginning , but then i decided to go back and watch it tell it ended. some of the plot holes i noticed make the actors in the movies look like raging moons. Judging by how many i caught the time i actually watched this movie, there properly is more that i didn't see.

The first one i noticed was when the 3 of so called, "Scientists" were in the house doing some computer research on viper. The power suddenly went out (there is there first clue they idiotically missed) so instead of realizing its viper , they just assume something unknown caused this power outage , even though they know viper is in town , and that he feeds on electricity because he is part hardware. Then the second part of this scene that made little sense to me , is that one of the Guys was actually dumb enough to go down into the basement to try and restart the breaker , which didn't work... DUH! Another thing that didn't make sense is instead of after hearing a loud growling noise , instead of running like a mad man out of there which he had time to do , he just stands there not even looking behind him at the basement for 5-10 seconds while Viper comes up behind him and rams him in the ass , eating him and killing him. How stupid can a person be ? I thought these guys where supposed to be smart ? Some of the techniques used in here make it look like a 60's horror film , and less like a 2002 Sci-fi flick. The next thing i noticed that made little sense was the Viper tracking machine was going off like a chicken with its head cut off, and the both the 2 guys who went into the basement went right by it and even looked at it for a second , but still continued , didn't they know it was a viper tracking system , and it was going off ? even a child could figure out something is up. The next thing that i guess sort a of make sense , but we didn't really know it at the time is , when the 2nd guy goes down into the basement , after seeing the dead guys remains that are left after viper ate him, he decides to have a sit on the step there and ponder his life. we find out later that he has some control of viper with that little device he has , but he didn't have it in his hands and viper could of killed him in seconds before he had time to shut viper down. The next thing i see is , after the girl scientist in the house sees the tracking device , she actually knows what it means , thats not the hole though , the hole is what happens next , she hears the 2nd guy on the phone talking to the guy that is funding his traitor-ist/spy what ever he is. She obviously can hear him because she's looking to see where he's out , so if she can hear what he's saying , why does she need to get closer for him to see her ? which soon after gets here killed ? what a stupid bimbo! There is no reason for her to stand out in the open so the 2nd guy can see her and know she's knows what's going on , other then so the guy can see her , and kill her. The next thing is after the guy goes into an office room there , she decides to go to the office where the guy in and fallow him i guess or maybe she wants to go out the door and runaway, she must really want to die. of course the guy comes out and starts chasing her around the house trying to kill her, the weird part is when the guy says no your not leaving and looks the door ? he doesn't use a key or anything , so why later when she comes back down stairs and tries to go out the door , wont it open ? last time i checked all you have to do is turn the look to unlock the door from the inside , the same lock he turned to so called lock it ? she either really dumb or really stupid , maybe both. She just really wants to die i guess , she then runs down into the basement , where she's 1 die is dead by viper , and decides to stay down there , until finally she gets killed. real shocker! geesh if that was a real situation , fate must of really hated her! The next one is more of a goof then a plot hole. When the guy and the girl are in the jail cell , and the 3rd guy that was the only survivor from the house shows up , were we learn he can control viper.etc. well when viper shows up there , viper is in the main jail room ,because the 3rd guy is standing next to him looking at the hero guy and girl who are still in the cell, but after he pushes the button viper falls down and then after the good guy opens the stall banging the 3rd guy in the head , he drops the controller , and it goes into the jail cell next to them , viper then re-emerges. after the girl kicks smacks the controller out of the cell , the guy steps on it smashing it , and viper rebuilds its self . then the good guy kicks the bad guy into the cell where viper is now ? wait i thought he was in the main room not a cell ?? and then when the Sheriff and deputy come in with shotguns and go cuss and start shooting at it , viper is in the main jail cell again! not in the jail stall where he was when the hero guy kicked the bad guy there into viper where he got ate. They screwed up this scene by putting viper where he needs to be to fit the script , and where he physically should be. well done writers!(sarcasm!) There are a few more but i just have to mention one more, that maybe be one of the biggest idiotic movies of this movie. When the sheriff and the hero and girl are in the cave , for some reason the sheriff tells them that he's dyeing of cancer and he should deploy the emp , so he grabs the emp bomb and decides like a complete moron to run right next to viper , i guess he wants to get eating quickly , and if he thinks that wouldn't happen , he's dumber then a rock , because of course viper immediately eats him! DUH ! I'm not sure why the writers wanted to kill him off like that , but hey what ever , maybe they where drinking when writing his part. Well thats all I'm going to tell about , i don't want to bore you to much :P i will give this movie a 3/10 for at least trying to put together a movie, but I'm sorry to say , you failed! Next time you write a movie , make sure the people who are portrayed in the movie have an IQ over 40 , or maybe the writer needs to have that before he writes another imbecile movie like this!
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5/10
Theresa Russel is a goddess. But that has nothing to do with this film.
Vomitron_G2 June 2010
Haha, I remember watching this movie not once but twice. Okay, with a considerable amount of time in between, I admit. I might be a fan of Jim Wynorski, it's not like I'm going to allow him frying my brain by watching his movies over and over again. And no, I'm not nuts for rating this 5/10. Just keep in mind that these are Wynorski-ratings and not average movie ratings. But still, this is more or less one of his better accomplished efforts. Believe me, he can do a lot worse. A whole lot worse. The opening-credits (especially the musical score) even seem to promise that you just might be entering the latest cash-in on "Alien" or something. Really, I kid you not! Decent score that echoes Jerry Goldsmith's work for Ridley Scott's film. Fancy outer-space effects. But as soon as the interior shots of the space-shuttle come on and the, uhm, actors do their thing, then you know you just entered Wynorski-territory. The creature itself looks like a gray CGI-blob with snappy teeth, tentacles and morphing skills. Pretty uninspired, I'd say. But still, the effects, and the whole movie for that matter, looked pretty much okay (once again: don't forget that this still is a Wynorski-flick). Tim Thomerson is fun as always. Patrick Muldoon isn't even trying, not by a long shot. And Theresa Russell... well, I like the lady, so not a bad word about her please. But what the hell was she doing in this movie? Oh, well, I'll forgive her, as always. And I'll probably even watch "Project Viper" again, some day, because of her being in it. Theresa Russel makes me watch bad movies. Just like Rutger Hauer does. Like I said, I forgive both of them for this.
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