Photos
Quotes
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Fred : [talking obliquely about Buffy] So, now that she's alive again, are they gonna get back together? Angel and that girl with the goofy name?
Wesley : Well, *Fred*, that's a difficult question. I think it's fair to say... , no. Not a chance, never, no way, not in a million years, and also... nuh-uh.
Fred : But you said he loved her. And of course she's gonna love him back, 'cause he's so strong and handsome and he really listens when you talk. I-I mean, if you go for that sorta thing, why wouldn't it work?
Cordelia : Let me break it down for you, Fred.
[imitating Buffy]
Cordelia : Oh, Angel! I know that I am a Slayer, and you're a vampire and it would be impossible for us to be together, but...
Wesley : [imitating Angel] But... my gypsy curse, sometimes prevent me from seeing the truth. Oh, Buffy...
Cordelia : Yes, Angel?
Wesley : Oh, I love you so much I almost forgot to brood!
Cordelia : And just because I sent you to Hell that one time doesn't mean that we can't just be friends.
Wesley : Or possibly more?
Cordelia : Gasp! No! We mustn't!
Wesley : Kiss me!
Cordelia : Bite me!
Angel : [entering, surprising everyone] How about you both bite me?
Fred : You're back!
Charles Gunn : How'd it go?
Angel : I think those two pretty much summed it up. To be honest I really don't want to talk about it.
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Angel : I doubt it. Durslar beasts don't usually come above ground like that. They usually stick to the sewers.
Fred : Lucky stiffs. They get to lead lives of mysterious sewage while I'm just plain ol' boring ol' Fred.
Angel : Boring? That's not a word I'd use for you
Fred : Fine. Nutty-ol'-goonie-bird-up-in-her-room-doin'-nothin'-but-moochin'-off-Angel Fred. I swear, I don't know how y'all put up with me. I practically need flashcards to understand my-
[looks past Angel]
Fred : Pretty crystals. Oh, look. They're everywhere.
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Angel : So, where do we start? Where would Fred go?
Charles Gunn : We could hit all the local taco stands.
[everyone looks at him]
Charles Gunn : Joke. Kinda.
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Cordelia : But, Angel, we're your friends. And, and it's not healthy to repress stuff like this. You need to share your pain, express those feelings of grief and longing or... the curiosity is gonna kill me!
Angel : Oh,no. Wouldn't want that.
Fred : Personally, I don't care at all what happened.
Cordelia : Shut up, Fred.
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Angel : [to Fred] Durslar Beasts are pretty Faulknerian. Lotta sound, no fury.
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Fred : This has been the best night ever. First, there's you taking me to ice cream, then there's the ice cream, then that monster jumps out of the freezer and you're all brave and, "Fred, watch out!," and then we get to chase it down into the sewers, which are just so bleak, and oppressive and homey. I-I could build a condo down here.
Angel : Well, I'm glad you're having fun.
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Angel : [looks at writing on the walls in Fred's room] Are you gonna remember everything that's up there?
Fred : Well, sure. It's a story. Once upon a time, there was a girl who lived all alone in a horrible cave - so far from home that it made her chest hurt. And every day in that horrible cave, the girl tried to figure out a way to escape. None of her plans ever succeeded, of course and she'd almost given up hopin' when one day, just like in a fairy tale, a handsome man rode up on a horse and saved her, and took her back to his castle. Now, you'd think that was the end, wouldn'tcha? Dumb old fairy tales and their "happily ever after's". But, see, the minute they got back to the castle, the handsome man went away again. And even though she didn't mean to - didn't want to - high up in that castle the girl just built herself another cave, hoping that he would save her again.
[to Angel]
Fred : But you can't save me this time, can you?
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Cordelia : In a really weird way, you know who I miss?
Wesley : Fred.
Cordelia : Actually, I was gonna say her parents. Is that wrong?
Angel : I don't think so. They were very - nice.
Cordelia : Nice? They weren't just nice, Angel. They were...
Charles Gunn : Parents.
Wesley : They loved her, supported her, didn't grind her down into a - tiny self-conscious nub with their constant berating, their never ending tirade of debasement, and scorn and...
Cordelia : At least now, Fred's got a shot at a normal life. Not that I don't love you guys, and L.A., and my work... but, things are just never normal around here, you know?
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Roger Burkle : Now, Spiro Agnew, I know he was a...
Angel : Grathnar demon! You knew that? I thought I was the only one that knew that!
Roger Burkle : What else would he be but a demon?
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Charles Gunn : [about Trish] Lady makes bug soup with a ten-ton bus, but show her a papier mâché head and she gets the willies. Huh, women.
Angel : Uh, Gunn, you do know it's not papier mâché?
Charles Gunn : [Gunn quickly drops head] We still got that bleach in the bathroom?
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Angel : [on his cell phone, trying to find Fred] What? No. You? Oh! You mean the place where she would go for help and guidance! And we call ourselves detectives. I'll meet you there.
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Angel : Look, Lorne, I'm sorry about the bar, but right now Fred is missing, and we need your help.
Lorne : Oh, really? Yeah, well, I am not some mystical vending machine, here to spit out answers every time you waltz in with a problem. I have a heart. Granted, it's located in my left butt cheek, but it's still a heart, and that heart is broken. I mean, why is it nobody ever cares about my destiny? Everyone who walks through that door is all about "me, me, me" - well what about my me? My me's important!
Angel : You know where she is, don't you?
Lorne : And another thing: How... How do they get the pimiento's in the olives huh? There's a mystery for you. Yeah. Do they stuff each one by hand? 'Cause that seems a little time-consuming. Or, do you think they have a little pimieno-stuffing machine?
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Trish Burkle : [about Angel saving Fred] He seems to do that a lot, doesn't he?
Fred : It's what he does. Angel's the champion, and Wesley's the brains of the operation, and Gunn's the muscle and Cordy's the heart, and I'm...
Roger Burkle : And to think, we were wondering when to call the cops on a bunch of superheroes!
Angel : Oh, I'm not really a hero.
Charles Gunn : More like a bloodsucking fiend.
Roger Burkle : Well, frankly, Angel, I don't care if you drink pig's blood, cow's blood, or those froofy little imported beers. You saved my little girl.
