The New Batman Adventures (TV Series)

Beware the Creeper (1998)

Arleen Sorkin: Harley Quinn

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Harley slowly rises out of an oversized cream pie] 

  Harley Quinn : [singing]  Happy anniversary, Mr. J / You're really swell and okay / It's seven years to the day-hey / Take the night off, let's play...

  [the Joker watches, gobsmacked] 

  The Joker : Harley...

  Harley Quinn : Wanna try some of my pie?

  The Joker : Harley.

  Harley Quinn : I'm sure you'll want seconds.

• Harley Quinn : Think Bats saw you, puddy tat?

  The Joker : Oh, he did! He did! He'd never miss a show about me! He's my biggest fan!

• The Creeper : Aw, sweetie got a boo-boo?

  Harley Quinn : [hitting him with her mallet]  Aw, creepo got a concussion?

  The Joker : [laughing until he sees Batman and Robin approaching]  Stall 'em, dollface! I'll, uh... get the car.

• The Joker : Harley, I'm not in the party mood. If you really want to make me happy...

  Harley Quinn : [getting thrown outside]  Ahh! Oof!

  The Joker : ...find the plagiarist who's been stealing my act!

  [tasting the bit of pie on his lapel] 

  The Joker : Ugh! Sweet kid, but a lousy cook.

• Harley Quinn : He's the creep who's stealing your act!

  The Creeper : And that's not all, Mr. Happy! I'm stealing your girl, too.

  Harley Quinn : I swear, Mr. J, I didn't encourage him!

  The Joker : That's okay, pooh. I know you're a one man loon.

• Harley Quinn : Hey, you're the guy swiping Mr. J's act.

  The Creeper : [punching Curly]  Not me! I'm one of a kind, toots!

  [seeing Batman, she cowers, but Crawler punches him, unaware who's there] 

  Harley Quinn : What do you want?

  The Creeper : The inside story on the Joker. Also, your phone number.

  [he growls playfully] 

  Robin : [Batman gets to his feet]  I see you found him.

• The Creeper : Ooh! Feisty cookie! I like her.

  [catching something thrown at him] 

  The Creeper : That's right, mama. Hurt me. I've been bad.

  Harley Quinn : Knock it off, creep.

  The Creeper : Creep?

  Harley Quinn : Well, you are agile. I'll give you that.

  The Creeper : [amorously]  And what else will you give me?

  Harley Quinn : Come here and see.

  [as he moves towards her, she pulls a level and drops a wooden crate on him]