- Daisy Moses: Elly, you get rid of the ants. I'll start the cookin'.
- Elly May Clampett: What ants?
- Daisy Moses: Start with your aunt Pearl.
- Cousin Pearl Bodine: Jed! them stairs is movin'! We're havin' a Californy earthquake!
- Jed Clampett: Now Pearl, them stairs is supposed to move like that.
- Cousin Pearl Bodine: What fer?
- Jed Clampett: I dunno, but that's what they call an "eskylater". Only thing is, last time we was here, they was movin' the other way.
- Jed Clampett: [getting off the escalator] Well, now that wasn't bad was it?
- Cousin Pearl Bodine: No, it was fun! Let's go up and ride down again.
- Jed Clampett: No Pearl, it's fun alright, but it just ain't worth fightin' your way back upstream.
- Cousin Pearl Bodine: So this is Californy. It's so warm and the air smells different from the mountains.
- Jed Clampett: Yep, looks different too. Out here, you can see what yer breathin'.
- Cousin Pearl Bodine: [Jed shows Pearl the kitchen] Why, a person could feed an army in here.
- Daisy Moses: Well, the way those two young 'uns of yours eat, that's just what you'll have to do.