The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)

Forty-Four Tickets (1961)

Rose Marie: Sally Rogers

Quotes 

• Rob Petrie : [to his coworkers about his PTA dilemma]  Any ideas, you guys?

  Maurice B. 'Buddy' Sorrell : Yeah...

  [snaps fingers] 

  Maurice B. 'Buddy' Sorrell : I got it! I got an idea!

  Sally Rogers : Beginner's luck.

  Maurice B. 'Buddy' Sorrell : Don't make jokes. This is on the level, this'll solve the whole problem for you. You get the whole neighborhood together, put 'em on a chartered bus and drive 'em down to the studio.

  Rob Petrie : How does that solve the problem?

  Maurice B. 'Buddy' Sorrell : Easy, you get a drunken bus driver and he crashes into a lamppost.

  Sally Rogers : I got a better idea: get a sober driver, have him hijack the bus and fly it out of the country.

  Rob Petrie : Thanks a lot, you guys, you've been a big help. I'm desperate and you're making jokes.

  Sally Rogers : Oh, come on, Rob, it's only the PTA.

  Rob Petrie : Only the PTA? You know what the PTA stands for? Three things that I respect - and fear: parents, teachers and associations!

• Sally Rogers : [to Rob]  You mean to say you're gonna let 34 people get all dressed up, hire sitters, drive into town just to tell them they have to drive back home, take off their clothes and unhire the sitters?

  Rob Petrie : Will you please not be so graphic? Let's just say I need 34 tickets.