Penn Badgley: Joel Larsen

Quotes 

• Joel Larsen : Dad, I don't think the type writers are gonna be the future. Personal computers are getting very popular.

  Bill Larsen : Ah, computers are a fad!

• Isabelle Meyers : When is the school gonna get an A.P. Physics class?

  Joel Larsen : As soon as they find a second student who wants one!

• Mr. Jenkins : Great work! I haven't even given you the list of leaves yet, and already you've opened three major accounts. How did you to know to call them?

  Joel Larsen : Well, I've been sent from the future to sell paper.

• [Joel and Pat are doing a Blues Brothers dance, but Joel's dance is rather unenthusiastic. He quickly stops] 

  Joel Larsen : I-I don't know, there's so much people around, and...

  Isabelle Meyers : ...and it looks like you're having a spasm attack.

• Karen Larsen : [to Bill]  Tough day at the office?

  Joel Larsen : Oh, you do not know the half of it! The phone never stopped ringing.

  [Bill and Karen looks curiously at him when he taps some scotch into a glass. He is about to drink it] 

  Bill Larsen : What do you think you're doing?

  Joel Larsen : Oh...! Um... You could probably use this, huh, Dad?

• Joel Larsen : No, no, you're not getting it! I'm totally stressed out! I'm cutting class, I'm not seeing my friends... and worst of all, I'm starting to lose my hair! I mean, look at this... this isn't supposed to happen until I'm twenty-four! I shouldn't be worrying about sales quarters or expense reports. I'm just a kid! Mr. Jenkins... I quit. God, that felt great. I hate this job, I've always hated this job! There's got to be something better for me out there.

• Joel Larsen : Not a lot of people at thirty-four can say that they've had the same best friend since the first grade. You... you've always stood by me. Even when I grew that I grew that ponytail. So of all people, what was I thinking, letting you down? And more importantly, what was I thinking missing the Blues Brothers? I'm sorry, Pat.

  Pat Brody : I just have one question for you: "What kind of biscuit bounces off your stomach and don't come back?"

  Joel Larsen : "Well, Jake... I think that'd be a..."

  Joel Larsen , Pat Brody : "R-r-r-r-rubber biscuit!"

  [does the Blues Brothers dance]