Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man (TV Series)

The Road to Dendron (1996)

Jason Alexander: Eric Duckman

Quotes 

• Eric Duckman : [approaching a woman]  Excuse me, you look like you've been around the oasis a few times. You know where I can find some hookers?

  [the woman punches him] 

  Eric Duckman : Hey, if you don't speak English, just say so!

• Cornfed Pig : We've got to get to the banquet and stop that toast.

  Ajax : But I like toast. It's the muffins that must be stopped.

  Eric Duckman : Okay son, now you're starting to scare the viewers.

• Eric Duckman : Who's tall, dark and creepy?

  'Beware!' guy : Beware, beware! That is the sultan's fahir, Achmed Abjeer, an evil man, full of tricks and tortures and torments! It is said that when the moon is full, he...

  Eric Duckman : [stopping him]  All right, thank you, we'll be in touch.

• Eric Duckman : [held prisoner while riding a camel, rubbing something]  Come on, please, something happen!

  Cornfed Pig : [sitting behind Duckman]  Duckman, you can't save us just by rubbing some magic lamp.

  Eric Duckman : Who said anything about a magic lamp?

  [continues to rub] 

  Eric Duckman : Come on, come on!