The Dukes of Hazzard (TV Series)

Welcome Back, Bo 'n' Luke (1983)

James Best: Sheriff Rosco Coltrane

Quotes 

• Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : [on CB]  Now Enos, this is your superior officer, Rosco. Now listen, if Jesse and Daisy, eh, try to keep us from catching Bo 'n Luke, we will use the figure eight manoeuvres that I taught ya. Come back?

  Enos : Sheriff, couldn't we just drive up beside 'em and just say hey? Huh?

  Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : Enos, you might say 'Hey' to them, but you'll say goodbye to your salary.

  [grinds teeth and spasms] 

  Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : You dipstick.

• Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : You know something, Flash? You know somebody played a dirty trick on your daddy. There was no naked lady in distress back there, when I... eeh. I saw... well, it was... You know, Flash, they say when a man gets my age, his eyesight's the second thing to go...

• Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : [upon Bo and Luke's return]  What a horrendous surprise.

• Cooter : What brings you out at the crack 'o dawn, Boss?

  Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : I'll tell ya what brings him out: he knows you're an early bird and him being a worm, he plans on catchin' ya.

  Boss Hogg : What? Rosco, what you...

  Sheriff Rosco Coltrane : I think I said that backwards.

  Boss Hogg : Of course you did, you've always been backwards.