Family Guy (TV Series)

The Father, the Son and the Holy Fonz (2005)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Tom Tucker, Aquaman, Vern, Jesus, Fonzie, Mark, Todd

Photos 

Quotes 

• Brian Griffin : Oh that's very Christian. Believe what I say or I'll hurt you.

  Francis Griffin : Now you're getting it!

  [Peter's Dad hits Brian with a Bible] 

• Peter Griffin : Please rise. Now sit on it.

  [everyone sits] 

  Peter Griffin : May the Fonz be with you.

  People In Church : And also with you.

  Peter Griffin : Let us ayyy.

  People In Church : Ayyyy.

  Peter Griffin : And now a reading from the letters of Potsie to the Tuscaderos.

• Brian Griffin : [at the church of the Fonz]  I can't believe people are actually buying this.

  Stewie Griffin : Hey, Fonzi's cool, Brian. Y'see, deep down, I think we all yearn to be Italian and stupid.

• Lois Griffin : Peter, your father won't let up about Stewie getting baptized. I am sick of him always trying to force his religious views on us.

  Peter Griffin : Alright, I'll talk to him, Lois. But uh, you know, when my father wants something, it's like sex with Kobe Bryant. You can kick and scream all you want, but... it's gonna happen.

• Francis Griffin : Every kitchen needs a crucifix.

  Stewie Griffin : Oh, yes, nothing says 'eat up' like a bleeding half naked jew nailed to a piece of wood.