Fawlty Towers (TV Series)

Basil the Rat (1979)

Connie Booth: Polly Sherman

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Terry is examining a piece of possibly-poisoned veal the cat had been chewing on] 

  Terry : Right! Now, how's the cat?

  Basil Fawlty : [Incredulously]  How's the c...? How's the cat? We're about to take the life of a public health inspector and you want to know "how's the cat"? IT'S GONE TO LONDON TO SEE THE QUEEN! What're we going to do?

  Polly : [bringing in the cat]  He's fine!

  Terry : Great!

  Basil Fawlty : [leaping about hysterically]  HOORAY! HOORAY! THE CAT LIVES! THE CAT LIVES! LONG LIVE THE CAT! What are we going to DO?

  Terry : Mr. Fawlty - if the cat is all right, that means that slice is all right.

• [Polly struggles to keep Mr. Carnegie, the health inspector, from learning of Manuel's pet rat Basil, named after Basil Fawlty, running loose in the hotel] 

  Manuel : The Major try to kill Basil!

  Sybil Fawlty : Kill BASIL?

  Manuel : No, not Mr. Fawlty. I mean Basil, my little...

  Polly : [suddenly, before Manuel can say 'Rat' in front of the health inspector]  RATATOUILLE!

  Mr. Carnegie : Basil the little...

  Polly : Ratatouille. The chef calls the ratatouille 'Basil' because he puts quite a lot of basil in it.

  Manuel : He put Basil in the ratatouille?

  Polly : Yes!

  Manuel : ARGGGHHHHHHHH!

  [Manuel runs off to the kitchen screaming, Polly following] 

  Sybil Fawlty : [charmingly to Mr. Carnegie]  He's from Barcelona.

• [Polly, with a piece of cheese, is looking for Basil the Rat under a table] 

  Polly : Basil. Basil? Cheesies! Basil...

  Basil Fawlty : [coming up behind her]  Yes?

  [Polly bangs her head beneath the table] 

  Basil Fawlty : Here I am.

  Polly : [coming out from under the table]  Oh, Mr. Fawlty I...

  Basil Fawlty : [taking the cheese]  Oh, that's for me, is it? Thank you.

  Polly : [as he eats it]  Shall I get you some more? There's plenty...

  Basil Fawlty : He's called "Basil," is he? Don't play dumb with me. I trusted you. You're responsible for this!

• Polly : He must have escaped, Mr Fawlty, and come back.

  Basil Fawlty : Come back?

  Polly : They home.

  Basil Fawlty : Oh, I see. He's a homing rat, is he?

  Terry : Oh, yeah. Rats are amazing creatures, Mr. Fawlty. I read about one once. His owner had gone down to Penzance...

  Basil Fawlty : Yes, yes. I read about that. When the chef got filleted with his own carving knife?

• Mrs. Taylor : Veal substitute?

  Polly : Well, it's Japanese, actually. Soya beans and essence of cow.

• Manuel : Mr. Fawlty take my hamster! He crazy, he think is rat!

  Polly : Manuel.

  Manuel : Hmm?

  Polly : Prepare yourself for a shock.

• Polly : I do remember a place where I had some really good veal once. Umm, only I... I just can't think of the name of it... It was, umm... Ooh! La-di-da. Did you see Annie Hall? La-di-da.

  Ronald : Annie who?

• Sybil Fawlty : Here's your veal, Mr. Carnegie. Sorry for the delay.

  Ronald : He's just been given veal!

  Basil Fawlty : Uh, no, no. That's, uh, veal substitute.

  Ronald : Veal substitute?

  Basil Fawlty : Yes, it's not very good. It got rather held up on the boat. On the way over from, uh...

  Polly : Japan.

  Basil Fawlty : Norway. It's a... it's sort of a... Japo-Scandinavian imitation veal substitute, and I'm afraid that's the last slice, anyway.