Fawlty Towers (TV Series)
Gourmet Night (1975)
Jeffrey Segal: Mr. Heath
Photos
Quotes
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Basil Fawlty : [overseeing dinner service, he approaches a table where the Heaths are eating] Good evening. Everything to your satisfaction?
Mr. Heath : Oh...
Mrs. Hall : Well, uh...
Master Heath : [cutting in] I don't like the chips.
Basil Fawlty : Sorry.
Master Heath : The chips are awful.
Basil Fawlty : Oh, dear. What's, uh, what's wrong with them, then?
Master Heath : They're the wrong shape and they're just awful.
Mrs. Hall : I'm afraid he gets everything cooked the way he likes it at home.
Basil Fawlty : Ah, he does, does he?
Master Heath : Yes, I do, and it's better than this pig's garbage.
Mrs. Hall : Now, Ronald!
Master Heath : [to Basil] These eggs look like YOU laid them.
Mrs. Hall : Ronald!
Mr. Heath : [to Ronald] Now look-look-look here, old chap...
Mrs. Hall : [severely to Mr. Heath] Shut up! Leave him alone!
Mrs. Hall : [sweetly to Basil] He's very clever... rather highly strung.
Basil Fawlty : [forcing himself to smile] Yes... Yes, he should be.
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Master Heath : [to Basil] Haven't you got any PROPER chips?
Basil Fawlty : Well, these ARE proper French-fried potatoes. You see, the chef IS Continental.
Master Heath : Couldn't you get an English one?
Mrs. Heath : Why don't you eat just one or two, dear?
Master Heath : They're the wrong SHAPE.
Basil Fawlty : Oh, dear... What shape you usually have? Mickey Mouse shape? Smarties shape? Amphibious landing-craft shape? Poke-in-the-eye shape?
Master Heath : God, you're dumb.
Mrs. Heath : Oh, now.
Basil Fawlty : [gritting his teeth] Is there something we can get you instead, SONNY?
Master Heath : I'd like some bread and salad cream.
Basil Fawlty : To eat? Well, there's the bread, and there's the mayonnaise.
Master Heath : I said "salad cream", stupid.
Basil Fawlty : We don't HAVE any salad cream. The chef made this freshly this morning.
Master Heath : What a dump!
Mr. Heath : Th-h-h-h-h-h-h-his is very good.
Mrs. Heath : [firmly] He likes salad cream.
Master Heath : That's PUKE, that is.
Basil Fawlty : Well, at least it's FRESH puke!