- Meagan Bailey: [after having exchanged information with Monica about their wedding dates and photographer] Oh, who's your band?
- Monica Geller: My fiancé wants the Swing Kings.
- Meagan Bailey: Oh, you're so lucky. My fiancé wants the heavy metal band, Carcass.
- Phoebe Buffay: [excitedly] Oh, is that spelled with a "C" or a "K"? Oh my god, it doesn't matter, they're both great!
- Rachel Green: Oh, don't get that here. Now that you know what you want, you should go to this discount store. This place is so overpriced.
- Store Owner: I own this store.
- Rachel Green: So, does this come in a different color or...
- Waiter: May I take your order?
- Dr. Ross Geller: You hungry?
- Joey Tribbiani: Does a bear shit in the woods?
- Phoebe Buffay: [somebody has just called Monica, told her something shocking and has then cut her off before she has had the chance to respond. Phoebe can't fathom what has happened.] Wh-what?
- Monica Geller: That was that girl Megan. She booked the Swing Kings on the day of our wedding and said I couldn't have them back unless I gave her the dress!
- Phoebe Buffay: [shocked] Ooh!
- [then excitedly]
- Phoebe Buffay: Does that mean Carcass is available?
- Monica Geller: [pleased] Megan! You came!
- Meagan Bailey: [cheerful] Yeah!
- Monica Geller: [holds up the white dress] This is my dress!
- Meagan Bailey: [cheerful but disagreeing] No!
- Monica Geller: [insisting] Yes it is! You saw me wearing it.
- Meagan Bailey: [smug] And now you'll see me buying it!
- Monica Geller: [disbelief] Wha...? You freak! You wouldn't have even *known* about this place if it wasn't for me!
- Meagan Bailey: [smug] Look, you don't wanna fight me.
- Monica Geller: [very firm] Maybe I do! I'm pretty feisty!
- [Monica takes out her whistle and blows it three times]
- [Phoebe hears Monica's three sharp whistles and runs across the shop]
- Rachel Green: [calls] I'm coming! I'm coming!
- [three sharp whistles are heard from the other side of the shop and Phoebe changes direction]
- Phoebe Buffay: [calls] OK!
- [three sharp whistles are heard from the other side of the shop and Phoebe changes direction again]
- Phoebe Buffay: [calls] Hey!
- [multiple whistles are heard from both sides of the shop]
- Phoebe Buffay: [frantic] Oh, what do I *do*?
- [Phoebe runs over to a row of Wedding dresses where the repeated whistling is coming from and finds Rachel hiding among the dresses, repeatedly blowing her whistle]
- Phoebe Buffay: [over Rachel's repeated whistle-blowing] What are you doing? Did you find the dress?
- [Phoebe pinches Rachel's nose, she stops whistling and the whistle falls out of her mouth]
- Phoebe Buffay: Did you find the dress?
- Rachel Green: [scared] No. You've gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
- Phoebe Buffay: [stands up] I gotta get Monica!
- Rachel Green: [puts her hand out] You gotta hold my hand!
- Phoebe Buffay: [sheer disbelief] Oh my God!
- [Phoebe takes Rachel and they run like crazy across the shop where Monica is sounding her whistle]
- Phoebe Buffay: [crazed] Excuse me! Excuse me!
- [Phoebe and Rachel find Monica, who has her dress and is pinning Megan down on the floor]
- Monica Geller: [passes the dress to Phoebe] Go! Go! Go!
- [Phoebe takes the dress and runs. Rachel is about to follow when she notices Monica holding Megan down]
- Monica Geller: [points] GO!
- [Rachel runs after Phoebe, Monica holds Megan down for a bit longer and then runs after Phoebe and Rachel, blowing her whistle three times]
- [a crowd including Phoebe, Rachel and Monica are gathered outside Kleinman's with signs in the background that say 50% OFF ANNUAL SALE TODAY ONLY!]
- Rachel Green: So this is Brooklyn.
- [Phoebe nods]
- Monica Geller: [firm and clear] All right. Listen up. There's usually only *one* dress in each size, so when they open those doors, fan out.
- [Phoebe and Rachel nod]
- Monica Geller: [unfolds a picture of the Wedding dress] Now, *this* is what you're looking for. Memorize it.
- [Phoebe and Rachel take a good look at the picture and then Monica folds it up]
- Monica Geller: [firm and clear] When you locate the dress...
- [Monica takes out three whistles and gives one each to Phoebe and Rachel]
- Monica Geller: ...blow on these. All right? Three sharp blasts. When you hear it, come running. All right.
- [a staff member unlocks the doors and the crowd starts pushing to get in]
- Rachel Green: Here he comes.
- Phoebe Buffay: Hey! No pushing.
- Rachel Green: No pushing.
- Monica Geller: [to her friends] *Don't* be a baby!
- [the staff member opens the doors and crowd stampede into the shop, but Rachel is knocked aside and falls by the door]
- Phoebe Buffay: [comes back] Hey! Rachel! Come on!
- [Rachel gets up and follows Phoebe into the shop]