The Honeymooners (TV Series)

Hello Mom (1955)

Art Carney: Ed Norton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ralph Kramden : Name one thing that could possibly be worse than my mother-in-law coming.

  Ed Norton : *My* mother-in-law coming! Boy, compared to her coming, the invasion of locusts was a boon to mankind!

  Ralph Kramden : Don't start, Norton. Don't try to compare your mother-in-law with my mother-in-law, 'cause you got a lose. It's no match.

• Ed Norton : [to Ralph about his mother-in-law]  I can't even afford to feed her. Boy, can she eat! When she comes to dinner, she clears that table like a hurdler. Gee, and is she fat. From the front, she looks like you from the back!

• Ed Norton : [to Ralph]  Ain't you even gonna give me a friendly Raccoon good-bye?

  [wiggles the tail on his coonskin cap] 

  Ed Norton : Whoo-ooo!

  Ralph Kramden : I wouldn't "ooh-ooh" you for anything in the world. Never again will I "ooh-ooh" you! You're a traitor and a turncoat, a disgrace to that uniform and the Raccoon Lodge! I should "ooh-ooh" you?

  [turns to leave, walks a few paces away, then stops and looks at Norton, with a look of guilt] 

  Ralph Kramden : Norton?

  Ed Norton : Yeah?

  Ralph Kramden : [wiggling the tail of his coonskin cap]  Ooh-ooh.

  Ed Norton : [overjoyed]  Brother Raccoon!

• Ed Norton : Can you give me one good reason why you don't go back with Alice?

  Ralph Kramden : Yes, my mother-in-law is coming.

  Ed Norton : Trixie, I gotta admit, he's got a good reason, there.

• Ed Norton : In Ring Magazine, my mother-in-law is number 2 contender for Marciano's title. I'm telling you, she looks at "Strike it Rich" for laughs.