The Honeymooners (TV Series)

TV or Not TV (1955)

Audrey Meadows: Alice Kramden

Photos 

Quotes 

• Alice : [complaining about how Ralph is always out at night, leaving Alice alone at home]  I'm left here to look at that icebox, that stove, that sink and these four walls. Well, I don't want to look at that icebox, that stove, that sink and these four walls! I WANNA LOOK AT LIBERACE!

• Ralph Kramden : Whatever happened to the sweet unspoiled girl I married before? Whatever happened to that girl, Alice? You remember what you said to me before we got married? "Ralph, I'd be happy to live in a tent with you."

  Alice Kramden : I'm still willing. I think it'd be an improvement.

  Ralph Kramden : Do you wanna go to the moon? Do you wanna go to the moon?

  Alice Kramden : That would be an improvement, too.

• Ralph Kramden : [explaining the reason he won't buy Alice a TV set]  I'm waiting for 3D television, that's the reason.

  Alice Kramden : Are you waiting for 3D refrigerators, too?

• [last lines] 

  Alice Kramden : Gotta admit it, Ralph. Once in your life, you were right. We never should've gotten a television set.

• Ralph : [referring to Ed Norton]  I've got one thing that he hasn't got.

  [pats his right hip] 

  Ralph : I've got it here.

  Alice : [placing hands on hips and stomach]  You've got it here - and you've got it here - and you've got it here.

• Alice Kramden : Why don't you just let me make you comfortable here because you've been gone all day long and I missed you something terrible, Sweetums.

  Ralph Kramden : [looks around]  Who's Sweetums?

  Alice Kramden : You're Sweetums.

  Ralph Kramden : You're nuts!

• Alice Kramden : What would you like, Ralph, lemonade or milk or juice?

  Ralph Kramden : Let me have what you're drinkin'. I wanna get loaded too.