How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)

Okay Awesome (2005)

Bob Saget: Narrator

Quotes 

• Older Ted Mosby : So kids, would you like to hear the story of the time I went deaf?

  Son : Why does he even ask?

  Daughter : I know, he's just going to tell us anyway.

  Older Ted Mosby : I sure am.

• [after leaving the loud club, everyone is talking very loudly in the cab ride home] 

  Ted : I'm really glad you guys came out tonight!

  Marshall Eriksen : You know, dude, can I just say something? It kinda hurt that you guys didn't invite me out. I mean, I know things have changed since I got engaged, but it would have been nice to be asked.

  Ted : I'm sorry. I just assumed...

  Barney : They played some great songs tonight!

  Ted : I mean, lately...

  Marshall Eriksen : I know, I know, it just seems like suddenly we're living in two different worlds. Maybe you've got more in common with Barney.

  Barney : [turns around]  What?

  Ted : Are you crazy? You think I like going to those clubs? I'd so much rather go to your fruity little wine tasting.

  Lily : [waking up]  Oh, my God, I'm gonna barf! Where's my purse! Where's my purse! I -... No, I'm okay.

  [goes back to sleep] 

  Ted : The problem is you can't do any of that couples stuff unless you have someone to do it with! And the only way I'm gonna find that someone is by going out and doing stupid singles stuff with Barney!

  Barney : [turns around]  What?

  Ted : But, man, when I find her, we're gonna have some bad-ass wine tastings.

  Marshall Eriksen : It's a plan. Hey, maybe it'll be that cute Coat Check Girl!

  Ted : Yeah! Maybe it will be!

  Older Ted Mosby : It wasn't.

  Marshall Eriksen : You know, Ted, I don't say this nearly enough, but I really value our...

  Barney : Hey, that place has great salads!

• Ted : [Talking to Kelly at the club; his words are subtitled due to the loud music]  You really like this place ?

  [Kelly nods] 

  Ted : You have no idea what I'm saying, do you? I'm from outer space! I got thrown out of Sea World for humping a dolphin!

  [Music stops. Ted yells] 

  Ted : I'M WETTING MY PANTS.

  [Everyone stares at him. Kelly leaves] 

  Older Ted Mosby : I think that's when I realized, clubs weren't awesome. Clubs weren't even "okay". Clubs sucked.