- Larry Sanders: Francine is writing the article.
- Hank Kingsley: I knew it! I knew it! She's a Judas!
- Larry Sanders: What you expect? You put your fucking name in every other piece of shit that comes down the pike.
- Hank Kingsley: You know this is very important to me. You know? Not that should concern you, no, no. We must keep the spotlight on the great Larry Sanders so you get to have your own show and I get to have dick.
- Larry Sanders: Could we please stick to the issue, Hank? Francine got hurt.
- Hank Kingsley: Yeah, right. Now I have to pay for the fact that you got back together with that cunt.
- [goes to the door, looks at Larry and feels completely bad]
- Hank Kingsley: Oh my God! Oh my God!
- Larry Sanders: Wow!
- Hank Kingsley: Oh no.
- Larry Sanders: Wow!
- Hank Kingsley: Oh no.
- Larry Sanders: Wow!
- Hank Kingsley: No!
- Larry Sanders: What did you just say?
- Hank Kingsley: No, no, I'm sorr...
- Larry Sanders: You didn't say, you couldn't have...
- Hank Kingsley: I'm sorry!
- Larry Sanders: Did I hear you...
- Hank Kingsley: I uh... I uh... I think it's the new hay fever medication.
- [last lines]
- Arthur: And I think you'll see that today is what I consider to be a typical day at the Larry Sanders Show.
- Hank Kingsley: [running] Shiiiiit!
- Larry Sanders: [on Francine's accident with the Hankerciser 200] She was so bruised Hank, she couldn't have sex, okay?
- Larry Sanders: [Hank is teaching the AFI interns to use his exercise product] What exactly they are learning here?
- Arthur: This is how I inspire the class.
- Larry Sanders: Uh uh. What do you mean exactly?
- Arthur: This is a lesson I call: If Hank can do it, anyone can.
- Francine Sanders: [about The Hankerciser 200] You know what, it's really working. I feel something.
- Larry Sanders: Probably embarassment.