- Danny: [watching the Wet T'Shirt contest] God, I love my job.
- Mike Cannon: More and more each day.
- Danny, Mike Cannon: [together] Damn!
- Mike Cannon: Oh, she's hot.
- Danny: Hotter than hot.
- Mike Cannon: Smoking.
- Danny: Firing.
- Mike Cannon: Somebody better cool me off.
- [Mike and Danny get splashed with a glass of water and then the camera turns around to reveal Nessa, Sam, Delinda and Mary standing next to them. Nessa has an empty glass in her hand]
- Mike Cannon: That was a rhetorical comment.
- Nessa Holt: [sarcastically] Oops. My bad.
- Mike Cannon: Now I see why they call you the "Ice Queen"
- Nessa Holt: And now you see what it's like to be in a Wet T-Shirt contest.
- Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: Hey, why don't you get up on stage and show us ladies a little something?
- Delinda: Yeah, Mike, Why don't you shake a little booty up there?
- Danny: What. A guy can't comment on a pretty girl without getting ragged on?
- Nessa Holt: Ragged on?
- Danny: Okay, maybe that's the wrong choice of words.
- Mary Connell: You think?
- Danny: All I mean was that's a natural instinct for men to notice women who are -
- Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: - Well endowed?
- Danny: Yeah.
- Danny: Survival of the species depends on man's ability to be attracted to women who look like that.
- Mike Cannon: Danny, you should probably stop.
- Danny: What?
- Mary Connell: She's a he.
- Danny, Mike Cannon: [both] What?
- Mary Connell: Your smoking hot lady is a guy.
- Mike Cannon: Mary, that's not cool.
- Delinda: Mary could hook you guys up.
- Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: Yeah, a little threesome
- Nessa Holt: But would it be a threesome with a him-her? Isn't it more like a foursome?
- Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: Or a two-and-a-half "mensome."
- Mike Cannon: That's not funny
- Nessa Holt, Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez, Delinda, Mary Connell: [together] Yeah, it is.
- Mike Cannon: That's not funny at all.
- Delinda: Mary, she's not a guy
- Mary Connell: I know that.
- Mary Connell: But they don't.
- Delinda: You're bad.