- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: [with family at kitchen table] Dad, can I have twenty cents for flowers for Miss Landers?
- June Cleaver: What's the occasion?
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: She's sick.
- June Cleaver: Oh, that's too bad. Is she going to be out long?
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: Well, I guess so - we're spending four dollars. When she was sick with the flu, we only spent two-fifty.
- Wally Cleaver: [Beaver and Wally, discussing their mother] So she won a cap for swimming, huh? Now, when we go to the beach, you can hardly drag her near the water.
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: Yeah, I guess that's 'cause when you're married, you don't care about having fun anymore.
- Wally Cleaver: Yeah.
- Wally Cleaver: Well Beaver, don't just sit there and look dumb. If you're gonna look dumb, go somewhere else and look dumb.
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: Okay, I'll go downstairs and look dumb.
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: Watcha doin?
- Ward Cleaver: Oh, cooking dinner.
- Theodore 'Beaver' Cleaver: Gee, I thought you could only cook outside. I didn't know you could cook inside.