Married... with Children (TV Series)

She's Having a Baby: Part 1 (1991)

Ted McGinley: Jefferson D'Arcy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jefferson : I'm going to be a father. Don't you have anything to say to me?

  Al : Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You're a dead man. It's all over. Today is the first day of the end of your life.

• Marcy : My Jefferson can't do enough for me. Would you believe right now, he is out getting me a pie? Sometimes he is so good to me, it just brings tears to my eyes.

  Jefferson : [enters the house, carrying a pie in his hand]  Well, here it is. I drove fifty miles, holding it up so the cherries didn't settle on the bottom.

  [presents it to Marcy] 

  Marcy : This is not a large.

  [starts becoming emotional] 

  Marcy : Is this all you think of me? Is this all you think of your child? Well, you just march yourself back to Wisconsin and get me a real pie, Mister, or you don't love our baby!

  [starts blubbering] 

  Marcy : A-sheeeeee! A-sheeeeee!

  Jefferson : [with restrained resentment]  Okay, honey, I'll be right back with another pie... ya stinkin' parasite...