- Carol Traynor: [Mrs. Naugatuck is cleaning the house while singing] Listen to her. She's the perfect housekeeper. Sings like a bird and works like a horse.
- Walter Findlay: Which is quite an improvement over your mother who works like a bird and sings like a horse.
- Maude Findlay: [Screaming from upstairs] GOD'LL GET YOU FOR THAT WALTER!
- Walter Findlay: And has ears like a rabbit.
- Walter Findlay: [Enters the kitchen, where Maude and Mrs. Naugatuck are arguing] Maude, SIT!
- Maude Findlay: [Maude obeys and sits like a dog]
- Mrs. Nell Naugatuck: [Mrs. Naugatuck continues to shout]
- Walter Findlay: Mrs. Naugatuck, SIT!
- Mrs. Nell Naugatuck: [She obeys and sits like a dog]
- Mrs. Nell Naugatuck: [upon entering Maude's home for the first time] You really should fix them steps.I nearly broke me bloody bum.