The Muppet Show (TV Series)

Julie Andrews (1977)

Jim Henson: Kermit the Frog, Rowlf, Waldorf, Beaver, The Swedish Chef, Muppet Newsman

Quotes 

• Kermit the Frog : [Swedish Chef has drawn cut lines on a real cow]  Scooter, would you erase that cow?

  Scooter : Oh sure, boss.

  [goes to do it, then turns to the audience] 

  Scooter : Erase the cow?

• The Newsman : Here's a Muppet News Flash! A plane carrying a load of sports equipment was forced to jettison some of its cargo. Among the items tossed out were ten thousand ping pong balls...

  [suddenly, many, many ping pong balls fall out of the sky, raining down on the Newsman's desk] 

  The Newsman : ... and one bowling ball.

  [a bowling ball falls out of the sky and hits the Newsman on the head, knocking him out] 

• [Gonzo was playing "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik" on the bagpipes while sitting atop a 10 foot flagpole] 

  Waldorf : Maybe he should quit while he's ahead.

  Statler : Gonzo should quit while he's alive.

• Kermit the Frog : Ladies and gentlemen, in a major feat of death-defying musicrobatics never seen before, the Great Gonzo will perform, on bagpipes, the Eine Kleine Nachtmusik from a flagpole ten feet in the air. Ladies and gentlemen, the Great Gonzo!

• [Julie Andrews performs "The Lonely Goatherd" with the Muppets] 

  Waldorf : Hurray! Bravo! I loved the goat!

  Statler : You would!

  [aside] 

  Statler : The old goat.