Mystery Science Theater 3000 (TV Series)

Quest of the Delta Knights (1998)

Michael J. Nelson: Mike Nelson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lord Vultair : It seems...

  Mike Nelson : Chilly in here, could you turn down your guy?

• Tom Servo : Hey, Alanis Morrisette is in prison!

  Mike Nelson : Finally.

• Mike Nelson : Wench-jacking was a big problem in the Middle Ages.

• Pearl Forrester : Okay, Nelson, time for your semi-annual check-up. So...

  [readies clipboard] 

  Pearl Forrester : How are you feeling these days?

  Mike Nelson : Doing very well these days, Pearl. Thank you.

  Pearl Forrester : No physical pain anywhere? No mental anguish? No vague feelings of unease? Poor sleep? Crying jags, hives, corns?

  Mike Nelson : No. Well, I was a bit upset a few days ago when I lost some shiny bottle-caps that I quite liked, but, I found 'em and ever since it's been damn good times. I'm feeling very very happy and I never felt healthier. I have a good life. Thank you!

  Pearl Forrester : *Why?* What is *wrong* with you? I work my fingers to the bone trying to make you miserable and you have the insensitivity to tell me you're *happy?*

  Brain Guy : You know, Pearl, it might behoove you to reevaluate the experiment itself. As a wise old Observer once said, to constantly repeat the same action and expect a variant reaction is surely a sign of madness.

  [Pearl punches him in the face] 

  Pearl Forrester : Then why do you keep mouthing off to me? You get the same reaction every time.

• Tom Servo : Hey, what happened to Crow there?

  Mike Nelson : Oh he went outside to check the ships gutters, the ratio kicked up and he got caught in a freak hailstorm.

  Tom Servo : Sure is the season for 'em, huh?

  Mike Nelson : Yeah, about three grand in hail damage, uh, it's gonna be about three weeks in the shop, but Gyps gave me a loaner Crow.

  [smoking rattling loaner Crow shows up] 

  Tom Servo : Cool. Hey, it's that old AMC Crow that Gypsy's been tinkering with for years.

  Loaner Crow : Hey guys, are there things that are happening?

  Tom Servo : He must be running rich.

  Mike Nelson : Yeah, well, I'll flip his air filter cover over and uh, he should be fine.

  Tom Servo : Check it out, he's got a killer radio!

  Mike Nelson : Oh wow, cool.

  [turns on radio] 

  Loaner Crow : Later we'll take stuff and do it, right?

• Leonardo : Come on, Tee. Besides being a pretty good artist, I'm *great* with maps, so how about it?

  Mike Nelson : How great can you really be at *maps*?

  Crow T. Robot : It's like being good at eating cereal.