- Kenneth Crisby: [having kidnapped Jeff] Now all we need to make this perfect is to bring in that vicious little bitch who kicked me in the head!
- Jeannie: Hello?
- Kenneth Crisby: Oh, happy birthday me!
- Gordon Stylus: [trance-like] She's gone.
- Kenneth Crisby: Yes, yes I know, very tragic. I was thinking of making a new contract.
- Gordon Stylus: Whatever, I just don't care now that she's gone.
- Kenneth Crisby: Let's say 50/50?
- Gordon Stylus: [snapping out of his trance-like state] 50/50? You bastard.
- Kenneth Crisby: Yes, yes I know, but I see that it's only fair that as my wife took half of everything I own, that I take half of everything you own.
- Woman in Restaurant: I don't know... what would you recommend?
- Jeannie: I recommend you dump this arsehole and go out with a human being.
- Man in Restaurant: I beg your pardon? Do you know who I am?
- Jeannie: [to the restaurant] Ladies and gentlemen, this poor gentleman has completely forgotten who he is. Can anyone help? You may have seen him at the circus, or on Crimewatch!