- Mushy: I always thought a trail drive would be an excitin' life, full of adventures. Well, maybe it will be when I'm a real drover. But right now, I don't seem to be too important. All my adventures are peelin' potatoes and carryin' water and washin' pots and pans and itchin' Mister Wishbone's back when it scratches. Why, I'm the cook's louse for Mister Favor's trail drive. The men call me Mushy because, well, I guess maybe because it's my name.
- Mushy: Please don't let her take me. I ain't never been happier than I been on this trail drive. The more I'm cussed at, and the more I'm laughed at, the more I feel like I belong.
- Gottfried: You gonna kill her?
- Vince Lohman: Unless you wanna marry her.
- Gottfried: That woman.
- Vince Lohman: Maybe we just oughta kill you. That way we won't have to worry about you being recognised.
- Mrs. Martha Mushgrove: Well, Harkness, how do you feel now?
- Mushy: Oh, fine. It was my head. Nothing to worry about.
- Mrs. Martha Mushgrove: Good, then we can travel tomorrow.
- Mrs. Martha Mushgrove: What are you waiting for? Three men with guns against one unarmed woman. You planning to send for reinforcements?
- Rowdy Yates: [Rowdy is distributing the mail to the over-eager drovers] Mister H Musgrove the Third? Sedalia Trail?
- [His lip curls with surprise and disbelief]
- Rowdy Yates: Musgrove? That must be Mushy! Hey, Mushy! You got a letter! Come on, don't yah want it?
- Mushy: Like Mr Wishbone says, I'm mighty well told I want it, Mr Rowdy. Thank you.
- Rowdy Yates: Now how about that. I waited in town for two days to get this mail, and Mushy is the only one who bothered to thank me.
- Wishbone: Ain't nothing to be ashamed of, boy. Lots of people can't read.
- Mushy: Would you read it for me, Mr Wishbone?
- Wishbone: Dear Harkness. Harkness Musgrove?