- Jackie: [to Roseanne, who tricked her into coming over while their Mother was visiting] You are just *evil*!
- Beverly Harris: Tell me, Roseanne, how many women can look that good without a drop of makeup? And your hair's adorable!
- Jackie: Thanks, Mom.
- Beverly Harris: You know, I'm almost glad your father didn't make it. This gives us girls a chance to have some fun.
- Jackie: This is Mom, isn't it?
- Roseanne: I'm not sure. Hold on, let me check that birthmark behind her neck. 6-6-5. Close enough.