Roseanne (TV Series)
Everyone Comes to Jackie's (1994)
John Goodman: Dan Conner
Photos
Quotes
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Dan : I know that I was able to take advantage of you.
Roseanne : Yeah right.
Dan : Do you not remember our second date? You had gotten into a big fight with your mom and were all upset, I wasn't thinking about your feelings, I was thinking you were ripe for the picking. A couple drinks later, we're checked into the Blue Rooster Motel, cock a doodle doo!
Roseanne : My mom was in Indiana, there was no fight, I just made it up so
[fake weeping]
Roseanne : you could comfort me in my time of need.
[later]
Roseanne : The fact that I had my nightgown in my purse should've tipped you off!
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Dan : [David, who is banned from the house, gets caught in the basement making out with Darlene by Dan; Dan shouts, slinging him into a door] What's the matter with you, boy? Can't keep your pants on?
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Dan : Roseanne, you've been saying it for years and I'm ready to agree with you; men are pigs.