- Simon Templar: Very tricky lad this Vosper. He's found out that most people like reading dirt, so three times weekly, his column dishes it up and by mixing a few grains of truth into a mess of innuendo and smut, Floyd Vosper pretends to report the load on celebrities. I don't know what you feel about it, but to me, it is like a dirty kid scrawling filthy words on a backyard fence.