- Tony Soprano: Did you ever know anybody that ever committed suicide?
- Janice Soprano: Uhmm, plenty. I used to live in Seattle, Tony.
- Tony Soprano: [repeated line when someone questions his agenda or refuses his help] what am I? A toxic person?
- Ralph Cifaretto: [refusing to loan Artie money after he asked for it] I hate to do it, Artie. But I think I'm going to pass.
- Artie Bucco: Why not?
- Ralph Cifaretto: Cause if you don't pay me back, I ain't gonna be able to hurt ya.
- Christopher Moltisanti: What's going on?
- Tony Soprano: The truck load the other night from Port Elizabeth: get the washing machines from Frank Cantino
- Christopher Moltisanti: You got it, vacuum cleaners too?
- Tony Soprano: No, Patsy's got a buyer for those. You been drinking?
- Christopher Moltisanti: Me and Ade had some wine at the house
- Tony Soprano: I've been wanting to talk to you
- Christopher Moltisanti: Yeah, I've been wanting to talk to you too
- Tony Soprano: I'll go first. I've got to make it my number one priority to limit my exposure to potentially damaging conversations: wire taps and shit like that
- Christopher Moltisanti: Sure, guy in your position...
- Tony Soprano: So, over the next couple years, more and more, I'm going to be giving my orders through you, and finally, only through you
- Christopher Moltisanti: What about Sil? You got that with him, and Paulie?
- Tony Soprano: Those other guys: Sil, Paulie, one thing they're not, they're not my blood. You hear what I'm saying to you? It's a matter of trust
- Christopher Moltisanti: It's very wise
- Tony Soprano: Sil's a good Consigliere and his going to continue on as such but his no fuckin spring chicken either. On the other hand there's no reason to give him a fuckin attitude either
- Christopher Moltisanti: No, of course not
- Tony Soprano: Now there's going to be a period of transition
- Christopher Moltisanti: [Excitingly] Jesus Christ, T
- Tony Soprano: You're going to take this family into the twenty-first century
- Christopher Moltisanti: But we're already in the twenty-first century though, T
- Tony Soprano: [Remains silent]
- Christopher Moltisanti: Whatever you say T, I'll follow you into the gates of hell. That's what I was going to say to you: what you did for me, that fuck who killed my father. I'll never forget that. I only hope I'm worthy
- Tony Soprano: Why wouldn't you be worthy?
- Christopher Moltisanti: [Before hugging and kissing each other on both cheeks] I'm just saying
- Tony Soprano: [referring to loaning his friend Artie money and knowing ahead of time Artie wouldn't be able to pay him back] so he says I planned it all along, how I could see twenty steps down the road how it was going to go and how he was going to get screwed
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Did you? See it?
- Tony Soprano: I don't know, according to him its subconscious, second nature
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: But the accusation bothers you
- Tony Soprano: Is that the kind of person I am? A hawk?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: As I understand it you make a lot of your living through usury so why the pangs of conscience this time? Do you think your reaction would be the same a week after you found out about Gloria?
- Tony Soprano: I'll tell you one thing: one suicide is bad enough but two? They can both go fuck themselves. I made a donation in her name to the suicide hotline, that's it
- Devin Pillsbury: I "pictured" your house different, I figured it'd be like Don Corleone's compound with gates and walls with a big old Cadillac, isn't that stupid?
- A.J. Soprano: [referring to the sequel of The Godfather, jokingly] our place in Tahoe looks like Michael's in 2
- Devin Pillsbury: [impressed] wow, really?
- A.J. Soprano: [smiles] no, we don't have a place in Tahoe: we have a boat though
- Devin Pillsbury: I'm like a gangster dude's girlfriend
- Artie Bucco: [as Tony arrives to visit him in the hospital] oh Jesus
- Tony Soprano: What happened?
- Artie Bucco: [Referring to the investment he tried to make with Jean-Philippe] it went to shit. The "Next Vodka."
- Tony Soprano: [Referring to his suicide attempt] so, this is what you do?
- Artie Bucco: You don't understand. The money is gone
- Tony Soprano: Can't you come talk to me? Hey, I'm your friend. Suppose you hadn't been able to reach me and I come over to your house and I find you dead, how am I supposed to feel?
- Artie Bucco: [Before crying] take the restaurant
- Tony Soprano: I don't want the fuckin restaurant
- Artie Bucco: How am I going to pay you back? Fifty thousand dollars, it'd take the rest of my life
- Tony Soprano: It's fifty-one five, "vig"-wise, and technically you already missed a payment. Alright, look, we'll wipe my tab at the restaurant
- Artie Bucco: Thank you, Tony, that's what? Six-thousand dollars? What about the rest of the money?
- Tony Soprano: I'll assume the guy's debt. Collecting fifty G's
- Artie Bucco: Thank you. The "cobwebs" are now removed"
- Tony Soprano: The fuck you talking about?
- Artie Bucco: You saw this whole thing didn't you? You knew exactly what was going to happen. You can see twenty moves down the road. Please, I don't blame you, I envy you. It's like an instinct: like a hawk sees a little mouse moving around in a corn field from a mile up
- Tony Soprano: You think it's my fault you're fuckin lying in here?
- Artie Bucco: It's just that somebody mentions fifty grand to bankroll a French thief and your mind goes through all the permutations at like internet speed and realizes "oh worst case scenario, I eat for free"
- Tony Soprano: You fuckin suicide, you're disgraceful
- Artie Bucco: I'm sorry
- Tony Soprano: No fuck that, is there anybody else know that it was me I loaned you the money?
- Artie Bucco: Like who?
- Tony Soprano: Like who? I don't give a fuck who: Adriana, Father Intintola, my wife, anybody?
- Tony Soprano: [after Artie shakes his head] You got mugged outside your house. It was a "street crime", kids, they took the wallet and your watch. Where are they?
- Artie Bucco: Why?
- Tony Soprano: Why? You don't care what people think? Well I do. Enough people hate me. You fought back. They ripped your earring out of your ear, you were bleeding, and went inside your house. You took a bunch of pills to kill the pain because you knew you had to wait at the emergency room for a couple hours
- Artie Bucco: Tone, they pumped my stomach. They saw the Armagnac
- Tony Soprano: You got fuckin mugged! Do you understand me? I didn't loan you shit!
- Carmela Soprano: [while in their bedroom] Sometimes I worry about Furio, I mean doesn't he seem lonely? I was telling Jessica about him this morning, you know the hygienist in Dr. Masara's office? I know I shouldn't gossip, but I think she was having an affair with Dr. Masara?
- Carmela Soprano: [shows him the photo on the card] Here she is: their office Christmas card
- Tony Soprano: [jokingly] Oh, yeah there's his hand on her ass
- Carmela Soprano: [takes the card away] stop it. Anyway, I think she's ready for somebody nice and she seemed very receptive when I described Furio to her
- Tony Soprano: She's not his type
- Carmela Soprano: Well, what's his type?
- Tony Soprano: Don't worry about him: stay out of it
- Carmela Soprano: One date wouldn't hurt
- Tony Soprano: Why'd you wanna bother? My little Hello Dolly?
- Carmela Soprano: Speaking of gossip, that noise in the Mercedes, I brought it over to Globe Motors to have it looked at and I was talking to Jerry in the service department, remember that nice saleslady?
- Tony Soprano: [lying] I don't think so
- Carmela Soprano: Gloria Trillo? She gave me a ride home that day? You know what Jerry told me about her? She died
- Tony Soprano: She what?
- Carmela Soprano: She committed suicide, isn't that awful?
- Carmela Soprano: [sarcastically, when Tony doesn't reply] Mr. Empathy over there: she hung herself from a chandelier
- Artie Bucco: [referring to Elodi, after seeing Charmaine ask her to remove empty plates from a table] she's a hostess: not a busboy
- Charmaine Bucco: [impersonating Elodi clapping] what was that all about, huh?
- Artie Bucco: it's just a venture capital "thing" with Jean-Philippe, I'm sure it wouldn't pass your incredibly high Wharton School of Business standards
- Charmaine Bucco: you want to make some "meaningful" money, why don't you get your friend Anthony Soprano to pay his tab? It's close to six thousand dollars
- Artie Bucco: [before he flicks his chin] I could have an "empire" like Bobby Flay, and it still wouldn't be good enough for you
- Charmaine Bucco: ok, I'll make you a deal, we'll start working on your "empire" right after we pay the ten thousand dollars of orthodonture our children will need this year
- Elodi Colbert: [referring to the number of reservations for the restaurant] already eighty-six tonight
- Artie Bucco: they come to see you
- Elodi Colbert: I eat so much of your food, I'm gonna get a belly
- Artie Bucco: is Jean-Philippe, ok?
- Elodi Colbert: what do you mean?
- Artie Bucco: he was gonna call me, I left him a couple messages, he didn't call me back, did you hear from him? Does he call your mother?
- Elodi Colbert: well, he always works late hours: the time difference, by the time we're waking up, their already at home eating dinner
- Elodi Colbert: [while giving him a CD] I almost forget, I bring you something
- Elodi Colbert: [before walking away] I have to put the flowers in the vases
- Artie Bucco: Can I talk to you?
- Tony Soprano: yeah, what's going on?
- Artie Bucco: [referring to the money Tony loaned Artie] I just wanted to give you a little "heads up", I know the money's due in a couple days. Frankly, I'm a little concerned, I can't get ahold of Jean-Philippe: he doesn't return my calls
- Tony Soprano: did you go over there?
- Artie Bucco: not yet
- Tony Soprano: well, you gotta get over there, the guy's not returning your phone calls
- Artie Bucco: I know
- Tony Soprano: If they miss a payment, they start acting like their doing you a favor if they give you anything and then you're spend all your time hounding them: you gotta get your arms around this "thing"
- Salesman: [approaches Tony as he looks at one of their cars in the dealership] they're on allocation from the factory, I don't know when we're gonna get anymore in but I'm free if you want to take it for a spin?
- Tony Soprano: actually, I was working with one of your other salespeople last year, she was really very helpful. I ought to give her the business, Gloria Trillo?
- Salesman: oh, well, she's no longer with us
- Tony Soprano: you know where she went?
- Salesman: actually, she died
- Tony Soprano: what happened?
- Salesman: well, she committed suicide
- Tony Soprano: why? I mean she was... salesperson of the year or something?
- Salesman: I didn't know her that well but I got the impression that she wasn't very lucky with men: that sort of thing
- Tony Soprano: when was this?
- Salesman: a month ago, maybe two?
- Tony Soprano: what'd she say? I mean... in the papers you read they always leave a note
- Salesman: she did leave a note on her desk: the police took it. Later, they told us it was a copy for a classified ad, she was selling her wolf stove. Anyway, let me give you my card
- Artie Bucco: Ok, in a nutshell, I'd like to borrow a "little" money
- Ralph Cifaretto: How "little"?
- Artie Bucco: Fifty thousand: just for a couple weeks, I'm upgrading the kitchen in the restaurant
- Ralph Cifaretto: [jokingly] Get the fuck outta here, what you take out of that bar, you must be sitting on money like King Croesus
- Artie Bucco: [amused] I wish
- Ralph Cifaretto: [referring to the interest his going to charge] You know, I'm not gonna be able to loan you money for less than two points
- Artie Bucco: That's not a problem
- Ralph Cifaretto: Just out of curiosity, what's gonna happen in two weeks?
- Artie Bucco: Oh, the insurance check is gonna come
- Ralph Cifaretto: [after thinking it over] I hate to do it, but I think I'm going to pass: sorry
- Artie Bucco: [disappointed] Why not?
- Ralph Cifaretto: [because of Artie's close friendship to Tony] Because if you don't pay me back, I ain't gonna be able to hurt you
- Tony Soprano: So, how you doing?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: What's going on?
- Tony Soprano: Oh, nothing: how about you?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Fine, thank you
- Tony Soprano: Really? Business, ok? Everybody "hunky-dory"?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Well, you know, "onward and upward"
- Tony Soprano: How's Gloria Trillo doing? Still "hanging around?"
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [referring to Gloria's suicide] It's a terrible tragedy
- Tony Soprano: [before he angrily approaching her and slaps her tissue box off her coffee table] So, you fuckin know, you lied. You let me fuckin sit there!
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [nervously] Please, sit down
- Tony Soprano: How the fuck am I supposed to trust you? You're my doctor
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [after smelling his breath] Please, sit down, you're scaring me: you've been drinking
- Tony Soprano: Why the fuck didn't you help her?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Sometimes you can't
- Tony Soprano: I bet you charged her enough didn't you, huh? I bet you didn't cut her a deal because you're a fuckin incompetent?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: I give my patients everything I've got and when something like this happens, I'm devastated
- Tony Soprano: [after calming down and sits back down] She was a good kid, but she was fuckin crazy and I told you that and I want you to know that I was up front with her: she knew I was married
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: I'm aware of that
- Tony Soprano: suicide? Jesus Christ, what the fuck?
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: I have to respect confidentially even after when a patient is dead, but with something like this, there's no one cause. You yourself just referred to her emotional problems, she slipped through everyone's grasp
- Tony Soprano: She did it after me, I mean admit it. You know, she reached out to me for me to care and I wasn't there for her
- Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Why are you so quick to blame yourself?