Star Trek: Voyager (TV Series)

Live Fast and Prosper (2000)

Ethan Phillips: Neelix

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tom Paris : Why didn't we see this coming?

  Neelix : Orphans! It's the oldest gambit in the book!

  Tom Paris : I-I mean, if it'd been Harry, I could understand it, he trusts everybody; but you and me?

• [Neelix and Paris have set up a shell game to fool the Doctor] 

  The Doctor : This looks like an interesting game. May I have a turn?

  Tom Paris : Well, be my guest, but, um... you'll have to wager something.

  The Doctor : [to Neelix]  If I win, you take three duty shifts in sickbay.

  Neelix : And if I win, you take three shifts in the kitchen.

  The Doctor : Done.

  Neelix : Ready?

  [he resets the game and begins shuffling the cups] 

  Neelix : Now, watch carefully. Round and round they go. Follow the tera nut if you can, but be careful, the hand is faster than the eye.

  Tom Paris : Careful, Doc, try not to blink.

  The Doctor : Don't you worry, Mr. Paris. You have to get up pretty early in the morning to fool my optical subroutines.

  [Neelix finishes shuffling] 

  Neelix : Where is it, then?

  The Doctor : In your left palm.

  [and to the other gamblers' great bafflement, he turns Neelix's left hand around, which indeed contains the nut] 

  Tom Paris : How did you...?

  The Doctor : Superior visual acuity. See you in sickbay.

• Dala : I cheated you. Why are you being so kind to me?

  Neelix : Like my great-grandmother used to say: it's nice to be nice.

• [last lines] 

  Neelix : [shuffling the cups]  Round and round they go. Follow the tera nut if you can, but remember, the hand is sharper than your visual acuity.

  The Doctor : I thought we'd already disproved that theory.

  Neelix : You tell me.

  The Doctor : [sighs]  The tera nut is firmly entrenched up your right sleeve.

  [Paris laughs triumphantly, and Neelix shows the Doctor his empty sleeve] 

  Neelix : [sneering]  Sorry.

  [the Doctor inspects it, then turns up all the cups, yet doesn't find the nut] 

  The Doctor : [baffled]  That's impossible.

  Tom Paris : The old handoff.

  [and from behind The Doctor's ear, he conjures - the nut] 

  Neelix : Ooo.

  The Doctor : That's cheating!

  [leaves angrily] 

  Neelix : [to Paris]  We've still got it.