The State (TV Series)

Episode #1.3 (1993)

Michael Ian Black: Various

Photos 

Quotes 

• Capt. Monterey Jack : My name is Capt. Monterey Jack and I'm not *tripping* here. But that's exactly what you folks will be doing if you don't tie your shoes.

• Capt. Monterey Jack : [to Kerri]  By the way, your shoe's untied. Made you look! You have to know, you understand me? You have to always be aware!

  Kerri : [holding back tears]  I love you, Capt. Monterey Jack!

  Capt. Monterey Jack : Alright, I'm not that crazy about you.

• Capt. Monterey Jack : Three things that are square: cheese, plates and bears.

• Doug : I'm Doug. I think tying shoes is for sissies.

  Capt. Monterey Jack : Hey Doug, if I want to hear foul language I'll go home, I'll turn on Marky Mark and the Funny Bunch!