Christopher Titus: Christopher Titus

Quotes 

• Christopher Titus : Excuse me. Why is a violent manic-depressive schizophrenic running the front desk?

  Dr. Phine : Because, she's so darn good at it!

• Christopher Titus : When I was seven, I watched "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" with my mom. When Jack Nicholson was strapped to the table getting electroshock treatment, my mom burst into tears. She said it reminded her of her life, and I was stunned, because I didn't know my mom had been nominated for an Oscar.

• [the hospital doctors want to start Juanita's hearing without Ken] 

  Juanita Titus : He's probably stuck in traffic.

  Christopher Titus : [accusingly]  Or in a mason jar.

  Dave Scouvel : Or something you put *jam* in!

  [Titus stares at Dave] 

  Christopher Titus : Like a mason jar.

• [first lines] 

  Christopher Titus : My mum is in a mental hospital. There's a fine line between genius and insanity. Winston Churchill, Mozart, John Lennon. These people all had a touch of crazy that fuelled their brilliance. They were not locked up for it like my mum. Pft. Then again, Winston Churchill never tried to kill my dad.

• [last lines] 

  Christopher Titus : My mum is in a mental hospital. Packing her stuff. You get a violent crazy woman released, you're a menace. But, if you do the same for a harmless medicated mum, you're a hero. And she sends you stuff. Because she's harmless and medicated. Like when they let her out in '73, and '76, and '84.

  [looking at jar label] 

  Christopher Titus : Christopher, say hi to your father. Love mum.

  [examines jar] 

  Christopher Titus : Oh god.

  [opens jar with trepidation] 

  Christopher Titus : [taste tests]  Strawberry! I love my mum.