Anita Barone: Vicky Gold

Quotes 

• Dave Gold : [to Hillary]  Hey, where are you off to?

  Hillary Gold : I'm meeting Brenda. We're going to the movies. Oh, and, um, her parents said that she could stay over tonight.

  Vicky Gold : Okay, fine. Just be home on time.

  Hillary Gold : I will. She has to call them from here by 11:00. It's the only way they let her stay over.

  Vicky Gold : They don't trust her, huh?

  Hillary Gold : No, actually, they don't trust you.

  Dave Gold : What? Why not?

  Hillary Gold : I guess they, uh, think that you and mom aren't exactly the best parents.

  Vicky Gold : They said that?

  Hillary Gold : No. Actually, they said you suck.

• Vicky Gold : [to Dave]  What was that?

  Dave Gold : Oh, that must be Mike playing with his BB gun.

  Vicky Gold : His what?

  Dave Gold : Ah, you know, he's been begging me for one, so I finally got it for him.

  Dave Gold : Dave! Why didn't you ask me first?

  Dave Gold : [Dave speaks to the audience from his 'thought room']  Same reason I never asked her for a three-way. She would've just said no.

• Dave Gold : [to Vicky about Mike's BB gun]  It's the same thing as when you got Hillary a training bra.

  Vicky Gold : Yeah, except I don't know any girls who lost an eye playing with a training bra.

• Dave Gold : Hey, what the hell's a V-chip?

  Vicky Gold : It's something that stops kids from watching sex and violence on TV.

  Dave Gold : Without the sex and violence, who the hell would want to watch TV?

• Dave Gold : [about Hillary]  Just because she got drunk, doesn't mean we can't drink. That's not fair. I didn't do anything wrong. I go to work, I make a living. If I want to come home and have a beer, my 16-year-old daughter isn't going to tell me I can't.

  Vicky Gold : No, but your wife is.

• Vicky Gold : You know, maybe we shouldn't drink while the kids live here.

  Dave Gold : Come on, Vicky, we drink *because* the kids live here.