Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton

Quotes 

• Larry Appleton : Balki, I thought you were out collecting clothes for the poor?

  Balki Bartokomous : Well cousin, I was. Look how generous people were. They give me their pants off their backs.

• Balki Bartokomous : You know, I can always tell when you're lying because you say everything twice.

  Larry Appleton : I'm not lying... I am *not* lying!

• Larry Appleton : Balki, Balki, Balki... this isn't Mypos. It's America! People break promises all the time! That's why we have all that Indian land!

• Larry Appleton : What did you just do to me?

  Balki Bartokomous : I just performed the Mypos Ritual of Promise.

  Larry Appleton : Am I still a Presbyterian?

• Larry Appleton : If I'm going to go on a diet, I choose an American diet. We know about dieting. We happen to be the fattest country in the world.

• Larry Appleton : The Mypos Diet, please! A country whose King weighs three hundred pounds?

  Balki Bartokomous : He has a gland problem.

  Larry Appleton : Balki, you told me he holds the world record for eating jelly donuts!

  Balki Bartokomous : He's also very competitive.

• Larry Appleton : This is my high school chorus jacket! Got a lot of memories in this jacket.

  [puts on jacket and finds he can't button it] 

  Balki Bartokomous : Maybe you should take some of the memories out of the jacket.