- Herb Tarlek: I'm telling you, Jennifer, in Paris, France, all the guys have a wife and a mistress, and everybody knows about it, and it's okay. Do you think it's okay?
- Jennifer Marlowe: Yeah, I think it's okay.
- Herb Tarlek: You do?
- Jennifer Marlowe: Sure. Send a French-man over to my apartment tonight.
- Andy Travis: [having just entered the control booth where Johnny is doing his morning show] I was, uh, listening to you coming to work this morning.
- Dr. Johnny Fever: Yeah?
- Andy Travis: Yeah. Very bright. Very, very up.
- Dr. Johnny Fever: Thank you.
- Andy Travis: Are you, uh, taking narcotics?
- Dr. Johnny Fever: [having just entered Mr. Carlson's office without being invited in] Hi, Mr. Carlson.
- Arthur Carlson: [angrily while he turns around to face Johnny pointing at the door] Knock, and I mean it.
- [while Mr. Carlson has turned back around to face the window, Johnny stays in the office knocking on Mr. Carlson's desk with his coffee mug]
- Arthur Carlson: Thanks. Come in.
- Dr. Johnny Fever: Hi, Mr Carlson.
- Arthur Carlson: [in the friendliest of tones] Hi. Johnny!