- Berta: How do you know Kandi?
- Mandi: She's my daughter.
- Berta: Your daughter? Sweet whistling Geronimo! You people are like a box of hamsters: just crawling all over each other!
- Alan Harper: Yes, well, we all get how this looks, Berta.
- Berta: Hey, I'm not knocking it. I'm just wondering when some of that gravy's going to spill over on my taters.
- Alan Harper: [angrily, to God] I watch *one* donkey sex show and you make me pay for it the *rest of my life*!
- Kandi: [to Alan] I think we've reached an implants in our relationship.
- Judith Harper: [Offscreen] Impasse!