- Hayley Smith: Plus-sized women drive our economy with their purchases of Garfield books and Häagen-Dazs.
- Steve Smith: She played Lady Macbeth in our school production of Oklahoma. Frankly, it was a mess, but our drama teacher finally got sober. Thank God!
- Hayley Smith: [to Stan] Overweight people have enough problems being disgusting without you making fun of them.
- Stan Smith: [after learning to stuff food into his cheeks from an anorexic woman] Thank you Veronica you fat whore!