Last of the Summer Wine (TV Series)

The Great Boarding-House Bathroom Caper (1976)

Peter Sallis: Clegg

Photos 

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Foggy : Boy, I'm looking forward to it. A weekend by the sea: salt air in your lungs, sun on the water.

  Clegg : Sand in your sandwiches.

  Foggy : I refuse to be discouraged by that cynical attitude. You're looking forward to it just as much as I am. When I called for you this morning, you were whistling.

  Clegg : Well, I had just opened my electricity bill.

  Foggy : No, you were happy.

  Clegg : Sh, not so loud! Nobody admits to being happy these days; they'll think I'm weird.

  Foggy : Exercise.

  Clegg : And the world is full of social reformers, and nothing irritates your social reformer more than finding some damn fool who's happy!

  Foggy : Oh, exercise is all you need. I don't keep this figure by accident, you know.

• Clegg : The older I get the more I seem to like dozy people. Hmph. Mind you, you get a lot of practice round here.

  Foggy : Oh, give me a razor-sharp intellect any time.

  Clegg : Oh, I will, the minute I find one.

• Foggy : Yes, well, I thought that was very palatable.

  Clegg : Oh well, we're still in Yorkshire, aren't we. It's not as if we've gone abroad like that damn fool Anderson from Murtly Street.

  Compo : Where did he go, then?

  Clegg : Liverpool.

• Clegg : [about Compo's aftershave]  'Biceps'. Which obviously means half of forceps, that is: a pair of tweezers with only one prong. Now, *that* could take a bit of getting used to.

  [sniffs] 

  Clegg : And this is going to take a bit of getting used to, too, which of course explains why it's, it's called Biceps.