How I Met Your Mother (TV Series)

Aldrin Justice (2006)

Jason Segel: Marshall Eriksen

Photos 

Quotes 

• Marshall Eriksen : I'm not really comfortable with you hunting my constitutional law teacher.

  Barney Stinson : Who would you rather have grading your paper? A savage, man-eating jungle cat, or a purring, satisfied kitty?

  Marshall Eriksen : Go, Barney. Go mount and stuff that cougar.

• [after Marshal infers his professor is tough on her grades because she needs to get laid] 

  Barney Stinson : Marshall, I've thought it over and I accept your challenge.

  Marshall Eriksen : I didn't challenge you to have sex with...

  Barney Stinson : Tomorrow, the cougar hunt begins.

• [in Barney's hospital room] 

  Professor Lewis : Mr. Eriksen, hello. Oh, I graded your paper tonight. I was

  [looking at the injured Barney] 

  Professor Lewis : pleasantly surprised.

  Barney Stinson : Yeah, she was.

  Professor Lewis : B+.

  Barney Stinson : B+? Marshal, after I've gone through my eight weeks of physiotherapy, I am gonna get you that A.

  Marshall Eriksen : Let her go. She belongs out there. In the wild. You should feel proud. You fought the cougar... and lived.

  Barney Stinson : It was an amazing safari. I can't wait to show you guys the slides.

• Marshall Eriksen : My professor's like, the toughest grader I've ever seen. She had like a bad divorce this summer and now she's taking it out on us. To tell you the truth, I think she just needs to get laid.

  Barney Stinson : [perking up]  Really? Laid, you say?

  Marshall Eriksen : You wouldn't be into her. She's, like, in her late 40s.

  Barney Stinson : She hot?

  Marshall Eriksen : Yeah, I guess she's kind of hot, yeah.

  Barney Stinson : And she's looking for some action. Sounds to me like she could be a cougar.

  Robin Scherbatsky : A what?

  Barney Stinson : A cougar. An older woman, usually in her 40s or 50s, single and on the prowl for a younger man.

  Ted Mosby : What's a woman in her 60s or 70s? A turtle?