My Name Is Earl (TV Series)

I Won't Die with a Little Help from My Friends: Part 1 (2008)

Ravi Kapoor: Indian Doctor

Quotes 

• [after being asked to say something good about Earl's injuries] 

  Indian Doctor : He has a fantastic mustache and, praise be to Ganesh, it was unharmed. Other than that, all we can do is pray. I bet you wish you had more than one god now, eh?

• [after comatose Earl's brother and friends save him from amazon trucker Sissy's bed] 

  Indian Doctor : He's suffered serious head trauma and massive internal injuries.

  Randy Hickey : Well, at least they're internal.

  Indian Doctor : He also has severely bruised nipples.

  [Joy looks aside] 

  Indian Doctor : We might not be able to save one of them. In addition, he has some palet shaped burns on the sides of his head. And let's see what else. His left buttock is filled with buckshot, his teeth are covered in bugs, and last but not least, we're not sure, but we think he might have had an involuntary orgasm.

  Joy Turner : Oh, my God, that crazy bitch tried to constipate the marriage.